The following is the third in a series on the subject of the “misunderstanding, misplacement and misuse of natural relationships,” begun in the October 1998 Christian Shepherd.
Christ’s Love A Pattern for Husbands
“Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity [love], I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal” (1 Cor. 13:11Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal. (1 Corinthians 13:1)). To have the tongue of an “angel” is to speak as one who belongs to heaven. The truth of Christ and the church, of which Christ’s love is the pattern and the standard for husbands (Eph. 51Be ye therefore followers of God, as dear children; (Ephesians 5:1)), is connected with “heavenly places” (Eph. 13). In nature, marriage pictures this wonderful heavenly truth. “This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church. Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife” (Eph. 5:32-3332This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church. 33Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband. (Ephesians 5:32‑33)). Were a husband to minister with the tongue of an “angel” these heavenly truths, while his own wife was not being loved, his ministry would be as “tinkling brass,” not more than “discordant” sound.
Oh beloved, could we expect our households to embrace the high heavenly truths which we seek to teach them when they see that the very “heart” and “motive” for the existence of these truths love is missing in the husband who is ministering them?
Then, should we understand all mysteries one being Christ and the church and all knowledge and “have not [love], I am nothing.” Beloved, as we seek to provide for our own household these wonderful truths we have come to “understand” and have “knowledge” of, let us remember that if our houses do not see the husband loving his wife, we will be as “nothing.” “Nothing” has no value to anyone. Truth we minister but deny in practice has little effect for good upon our families. Lot is a solemn testimony to us of this.
The Role of Wives in Marriage
Now we will consider the God-ordained place of wives, their role in nature and how it must affect others. “The husband is the head of the wife.... Therefore as the church is subject [subjected] unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything” (Eph. 5:23-2423For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. 24Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. (Ephesians 5:23‑24)). Accompanying this submission, there is to be a meek and quiet spirit. For others to see the absence of a meek and quiet spirit in your professed subjection to your husband in the realm of nature has a devastating effect upon them in regards to the spiritual realm. “Teach... women... to be... obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed [evil spoken of]” (Titus 2:45).
“Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation [manner of life] of the wives; while they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. Whose adorning... let it be the hidden man of the heart... even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price” (1 Peter 3:1414But and if ye suffer for righteousness' sake, happy are ye: and be not afraid of their terror, neither be troubled; (1 Peter 3:14)).
Blessing Results From a Wife’s Obedience
Oh what a solemn thing for a Christian wife to weigh! Her failure in her role as wife can actually cause the precious Word of God to be evil spoken of and also can be a hindrance to her husband being “won.” That is, by fulfilling her role properly, her husband may be brought into obedience to the Word. Add to this the very solemn thought that a Christian wife’s behavior in her marriage can actually be used to the salvation of her husband, should she have one who is not saved. Subjected and Subject Then there is one more consideration that is of importance to the beloved wives mothers. I noted that the church was “subjected,” not necessarily “subject.” Surely we know the church has been anything but subject to Christ and, oh, what solemn consequences.
Should you choose not to be “subject” in your given role of “subjection,” consider the effect upon your house the house you are responsible to “build” (Prov. 14:11Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands. (Proverbs 14:1)). You teach your “house” that disobedience to God’s Word is without consequence. Consider, beloved wife and mother, where did the woman’s being deceived lead her firstborn child? Does it not sober our hearts to have it recorded in God’s Word: “Cain, who was of that wicked one [the devil], and slew his brother.” What a price she paid to take the lead in the realm of nature!
Maintaining, not Misunderstanding Marriage
Finally, beloved ones, let us hear this word from God to those of us who have entered into this natural relationship of marriage. “Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them [our wives] according to knowledge, giving honor unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.” To be careless in maintaining the marriage relationship in its intended beauty, that beauty of expressing the wonderful spiritual relationship of Christ and the church, is to have our “prayers hindered.”
Yes, nature misunderstood and not properly held seriously affects our spiritual life. May we soberly weigh the consequences of misunderstanding our roles in nature.
H. Short
Lord willing, in the January 1999 issue of the Christian Shepherd we will continue this series with the subject of “misplaced marriages.”