"As it hath pleased the Lord in His tender love to have strengthened me both in my head and my poor body, I could not let another mail leave this country without sending you, if it were only but a few lines, not only for the joy it gives me, but also because I know it will cheer your sorrowing hearts, to see your precious Boy's writing again. We have all prayed much that our heavenly Father would support you under this heavy trial. ' His will be done. The Lord has some good purposes in it, dear Papa and Mamma. When He sends affliction and chastisement, it is in the tenderest love; He will also give grace and strength to bear it. I have felt this very much: He has given me so much peace and joy in my pain. I desire nothing else but His glory in me, (that whether I should depart and be with Him, or be spared a little longer,) His name might be glorified in me abundantly. Yes, dear parents, I have no desire to recover, excepting I serve (Him.) I do much dread that this poor vain world and the many things (in it) might again draw my youthful heart from following my precious Savior. If He sees fit to allow us to meet again on this Earth, oh, it will indeed be joy! but if not, we shall meet in a better land; there we shall never shed one tear of grief or pain; and we shall see His face. Rev. 22:3, 43And there shall be no more curse: but the throne of God and of the Lamb shall be in it; and his servants shall serve him: 4And they shall see his face; and his name shall be in their foreheads. (Revelation 22:3‑4). The Lord give us much resignation and submission to His holy will, and grace to leave it patiently in His hands to order and to plan. I can thank the Lord indeed for this affliction. He has taught me how vain the poor things of this world are; how unable to make one happy. He has taught me of His love and my thorough vileness; but the Lord never teaches us (our) utter worthlessness in His sight, without teaching us more of his love. My Bible and Hymn Book are my daily companions; but it is only lately that I have been able to read them myself, my eyes and my head have been so giddy. Oh, what a privilege to have that precious Book to cheer us through this world of sickness and sorrow! So, many thanks, beloved Papa and Mamma, for the one you sent me; and, I hope, if the Lord still continues to strengthen me, soon to be able to use it. The Lord has given me many kind friends; dear Mr. and Mrs. Deck have indeed shown unremitting kindness; and they and other friends have done everything to make me comfortable. Our dear aunts have also sent me grapes, &c. The Lord will reward them, for He has promised so to do. Matt. 10:4242And whosoever shall give to drink unto one of these little ones a cup of cold water only in the name of a disciple, verily I say unto you, he shall in no wise lose his reward. (Matthew 10:42). May the Lord be with you, DEAR Papa and Mamma, and plan and direct your steps. I must now say, good-bye. I never thought of writing such a long letter to you when I began. My brothers and sisters join with me in the most affectionate love to yourselves, Lizzy, Syd, and Eddy.
From Your loving and affectionate Son,
"AUGUSTUS J. CLARKE.”
"I will never leave you nor forsake you.”
[One of my children found yesterday a copy of that sweet little book, "The sympathy of Jesus," in which Augustus wrote in pencil, "A. CLARKE, FROM AUNT SARAH, April 1, 1845." He has underlined part of the following passage, which so strikingly describes his own case and experience:—
“There cannot be anything more instructive, nor anything which more forcibly shews the power and reality of true religion, than a child of God, deeply feeling his affliction, yet quieted and supported under the stroke of his heavenly Father's hand, saying with Eli, `It is the Lord, let Him do what seemeth Him good.' With Daniel, ‘I was dumb, I opened not my mouth, because Thou didst it.'"]
March 22, 1847.
The improvement in dear Augustus's health was only for a short time. It gave us a momentary gleam of hope, which soon passed away. On the 7th of April he became worse again, and I returned home to meet Mr. B—from E—. His opinion was, that, though there had been some improvement, the disease itself was gaining ground; but remedies could now be used which his former weakness rendered impracticable. It is sweet to witness the patience of this beloved boy; the expression of his countenance so subdued and placid. He was greatly cheered by visits at this time from his aunts, whose kind and tender solicitude was a great comfort, both to him and to ourselves. On the 15th, his appetite failed, constant nausea, came on, his sufferings greatly increased, his mouth and tongue became exceedingly sore. All that he could fancy was supplied by the kindness of his friends, but in vain. He fancied one thing to-day, and, when provided, was unable to eat it the next. I again went on with my Journal, from which I make the following extracts:—
April 20.-About this time, Augustus asked Eliza for a looking-glass; on seeing his pale, sunken countenance, he said, quite cheerfully, "I did not think I was so altered; I look even now like a corpse." Death has lost its terror and its sting.
April 24.—A hearse passed by the house. Augustus saw it, and said, with the sweetest cheerfulness, "I suppose the next time it comes this way it will be for me." And so it proved.
April 25.—I carried him in my arms this morning into the nursery, where he remained during the day, while his room was thoroughly aired. He much enjoyed the change. Having lost his appetite, he daily gets weaker. When I began to read 1 Cor. 15., he smiled, saying, “I have been reading that chapter this morning myself." We spoke of the ruin which the first Adam had brought into the world by sin. "In Adam all die." Sin had brought corruption, dishonor, weakness, and mortality upon our natural bodies; and we rejoiced together in the victory of the second Adam "the Lord from heaven;" and in the hope of that blessed day when "death shall be swallowed up in victory." "In Christ all shall be made alive." He shall change our vile body, that it may be fashioned like unto His glorious body, Phil. 3.; when it shall be raised in incorruption, in glory, in power, a spiritual and heavenly body, fit for the mansions in the Father's house, which Jesus is gone before us to prepare.
After reading, I said, "Dear Augustus, have you any regrets when you look forward?" He replied, “What do you mean, Papa?” "Do you regret being taken away so young?" He answered, "No," with a sweet smile. "But do you not regret leaving all who love you so dearly" He smiled again, but answered nothing till I said, "You think Jesus better than us all." "Yes, dear Papa." "And do you regret anything when you look back upon the past?" The question touched his conscience. His pale face became flushed with emotion, and his eyes filled with tears; he could not speak—he could scarce restrain himself. I added, "I know what you regret. Is it not that which the blood of Jesus has blotted out?" "Yes, Papa." I told him that God remembered not his sins and iniquities against him anymore; and that he must only remember them to be humbled with praise and thanksgiving before Him "who had blotted out his transgressions for His own sake, and would not remember his sins.”
It is a source of special thankfulness to see his deep sense of the evil of past sin, and yet unshaken confidence and peace through the blood of Jesus.
When Sarah K—was washing him this morning, he said to her, “Sarah, I have had such a cheer! Papa told me last night, when he prayed for me, that it would not be long before I should be with Jesus. "She asked him if that would make him happy; he said," Yes," with a look full of joy.
April 27.—Sarah K—, speaking to him of the children, said, "I shall have an odd number when you are gone." He replied, "Yes, Sarah; one of your cares will be in heaven." At night, when she was putting him into bed, he said to her, with a sweet smile, "It will only be a little while, Sarah.”
April 28.—To-day, when sitting up in bed, with his head on Sarah's shoulder, he said he should like something, but he thought he had better not say what; but, after a little while, he told her that he should like to be with Jesus tomorrow; he knew it would be soon. On her saying, "It is hard to part with those we love;" he replied, "Yes, and with those we leave behind.”
Mr. C—of B—, a faithful minister of Christ, saw him, and prayed with him this morning as for one of the precious lambs of Christ's flock, rejoicing greatly in the great things the Lord had done for his soul. One of his dear aunts also saw him.
April 29.—Augustus still gets weaker-his appetite quite gone, much pain, and constant sickness; but so patient and happy! Mr. C—sent him this text, "Fear not, for I have redeemed thee; I have called thee by thy name; thou art mine.”
April 30. —He told me that he had passed a very happy night thinking of the sweet text
Mr. C— sent him. Miss K—also saw him. We read with him the 10th chapter of John. We dwelt on the character of the Good Shepherd; His care over the sheep the Father gave Him; His love in laying down His life for their sakes; the security of His sheep; "They shall never perish;" none can pluck them either out of His own hand or His Father's. He greatly enjoyed it. When I expressed a fear lest he should be tired, he asked me to go on. I left Miss K—with him; she had lately lost a beloved sister of her own, and spoke to Augustus of her illness and happy death. She repeated to him a hymn which had been a favorite of her sister's on her dying-bed. He very much enjoyed it, and requested her to give him a copy, which I insert, as it is not generally known:—
"How do Thy mercies close me round
Forever be Thy name adored!
I blush in all things to abound—
‘The servant is above his Lord.'
“Inured to poverty and pain,
A suffering life my Master led;
The Son of God, the Son of Man,
He had not where to lay His head.
"But, lo! a place He path prepared
For me, whom watchful angels keep;
Yes, He himself becomes my guard,
He smoothes my bed, and gives me sleep.
"Jesus protects I My fears, begone!
What can the Rock of Ages move
Safe in Thine arms I lay me down,
Thine everlasting arms of love.
“Whilst Thou art intimately nigh,
Who, who can violate my rest?
Sin, earth, and hell I can defy-
I lean upon my Savior's breast.
"I rest beneath the Almighty's shade,
My griefs expire, my troubles cease;
Thou, Lord, on whom my soul is stay'd,
Wilt keep my soul in perfect peace.
“Me for Thine own Thou lovest to take,
For time and for eternity;
Thou never, never wilt forsake
A helpless worm that trusts in Thee.”
He told Miss K—that the happiest time of his life was since he had been lying on his bed of sickness.
May 1.—Augustus is very happy, and very patient, but is suffering great pain and weakness. His poor body is reduced almost to a skeleton.
In the evening, when I entered his room, I was much struck by the rapid change which had taken place in him; his voice was thick, and his hearing affected. After a while his hearing returned, and I repeated to him that sweet hymn, "Rock of Ages, cleft for me," which he evidently much enjoyed; he repeated it after me. After the usual fomentations, I carried him in my arms, for the last time, to his bed. He would not suffer me to sit up with him; and as he had rallied a little I left him, desiring Sarah to call me if any change took place.
May 2.—When I entered his room, I learned that he had passed a restless night; he had been very sick, and felt very weak. He told me that he had been very happy; he had peace through the blood of Jesus. He looked so very weak, that I felt he could not be here many hours, and I exclaimed, with my heart full of anguish, "Dear child!" He looked at me most affectionately, and with one of his beautiful smiles, he stretched out his arms towards me, and said, with touching tenderness, "Precious Papa!" I can never forget these words, or that look of love and peace. I knelt down by his bedside, and read John 5:24, 25,24Verily, verily, I say unto you, He that heareth my word, and believeth on him that sent me, hath everlasting life, and shall not come into condemnation; but is passed from death unto life. 25Verily, verily, I say unto you, The hour is coming, and now is, when the dead shall hear the voice of the Son of God: and they that hear shall live. (John 5:24‑25) out of the Bible sent him by his dear Papa from India, which was nearly always on his pillow; and then John 6:37-4737All that the Father giveth me shall come to me; and him that cometh to me I will in no wise cast out. 38For I came down from heaven, not to do mine own will, but the will of him that sent me. 39And this is the Father's will which hath sent me, that of all which he hath given me I should lose nothing, but should raise it up again at the last day. 40And this is the will of him that sent me, that every one which seeth the Son, and believeth on him, may have everlasting life: and I will raise him up at the last day. 41The Jews then murmured at him, because he said, I am the bread which came down from heaven. 42And they said, Is not this Jesus, the son of Joseph, whose father and mother we know? how is it then that he saith, I came down from heaven? 43Jesus therefore answered and said unto them, Murmur not among yourselves. 44No man can come to me, except the Father which hath sent me draw him: and I will raise him up at the last day. 45It is written in the prophets, And they shall be all taught of God. Every man therefore that hath heard, and hath learned of the Father, cometh unto me. 46Not that any man hath seen the Father, save he which is of God, he hath seen the Father. 47Verily, verily, I say unto you, He that believeth on me hath everlasting life. (John 6:37‑47). I paused at the 38th verse; he smiled most sweetly, and said something; but his voice was thick, and I could not understand him, until he had repeated twice, “How sweet are the words of Papa!”
After reading that precious promise, twice repeated in the 38th and 39th verses, "I will raise him up at the last day," I asked him if he had fixed upon any suitable text for his tombstone; he replied, "Nothing particular, Papa." I then read Rev. 7, and said, "I will stop now, for you are tired;" he replied, "Please go on, Papa." I began to read Rev. 21, that glorious description of the new heavens and new earth, when God shall wipe away all tears from the eyes of His people, and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain,—when the bell rang to summon the family to worship. He then said, " Papa, this is my text, Ye are not your own, ye are bought with a price,'—no—not that exactly,—but a text something like that in the first chapter of Peter. "His weakness had evidently impaired his remarkably clear and retentive memory. I repeated," Ye are not redeemed with corruptible things, such as silver and gold, from your vain conversation received by tradition from your fathers, but with the precious blood of Christ, as of a Lamb without blemish and without spot. "He smiled, and said," That is it, Papa.”
Seeing how near the hour of his departure evidently was, I desired that as a family we might all for the last time meet together on earth before the throne of grace; and that he might bear testimony to those so dear to him, of the peace which God had given him, through the finished work and righteousness of Christ. We had often cried to the Lord that Augustus might be enabled, before he fell asleep, to bear such testimony to his young companions, as might be sealed upon their hearts and consciences in after-years. I therefore proposed to him to meet in his room for worship; he gladly consented to it, and we all assembled round his dying-bed. I then asked him, in the presence of them all, "Dear Augustus, will you tell us if you are happy?" He answered, "Happy, quite happy." "What makes you happy? is it Jesus?" He replied with the deepest emphasis, "Papa, Jesus is ALL my peace." "Is there anything you would desire for your brothers and sisters, and for these other dear children?" "Yes, that they may all come to Jesus." "Is there nothing else you desire for them? Would you not wish them, not only to be saved by Jesus, but also to follow Him?" At this question, which touched his heart and conscience, his pale, emaciated face became red with emotion; his eyes filled with tears, as he solemnly lifted up his hand and answered, "Yes, that they may follow Jesus," -and he added, with the deepest emphasis, "more than I have done.”
Again our hearts rejoiced to see the union of deep self-judgment with the firmest rest and peace in believing. “Have you any message you desire to send to your beloved parents?" “Tell them I am quite happy—I am going to Jesus; Jesus is all my peace!”
We then knelt down together, and commended him, in body, soul, and spirit, to the care of our faithful God and Father. We praised Him for His rich and abounding grace to His dear suffering child; and besought Him to fill his soul with peace and joy, when passing through the last struggle, and that the words he had uttered might be graven by His Spirit on all our hearts. He then tenderly kissed each of us, and we went down to breakfast.
About 11 o'clock, Augustus felt a difficulty of breathing coming on; he turned to Sarah K— and said, "Dear Sarah, I thank you for all your kindness and love to me." The difficulty of breathing appearing to increase, I sent for his sister Lucy, that she might be with him to the end; it was only then that she seemed to realize that her dear brother was really going to be taken from her. He said to me, "O Papa, I can't breathe." I replied," It is only a little while, "and wiped the cold dewdrops of death from his pale forehead. He was quite sensible and happy, his face beaming with peace and love. As he seemed so ready to depart, we again assembled all the family in his chamber; he took leave of each most tenderly. The love of God filled his heart with love to all around him; he called for Mr D—, his kind teacher, and put his arms round his neck and kissed him; he did this to each of us, kissing us with all his heart, making quite an effort to give to each of us a full, last, parting kiss. He was exhausted by the effort, and I offered him a little brandy and water; he smiled, most sweetly, and said, as one that longed to be with Jesus," O Papa, don't stop me! "He took some, which revived him for a little. Two or three times he put his arms most lovingly round my neck, and kissed me, saying," O Papa, it is hard to part, but I am going to Jesus! It is so hard to part with you, Papa!”
At one time the expression of his countenance was quite heavenly; it beamed with happiness and joy. His eyes looked upwards; he lifted up his hands and pointed them towards heaven, as if like Stephen of old, he saw it opened, and Jesus standing ready to receive his departing spirit, while he said, "Come, come, come, Lord Jesus 1" We had never seen him look so lovely before; it was indeed a triumph of the grace of God, the fruit of His victory, who through death had destroyed him that had the power of death, even the devil. We rejoiced and wept, and wept and rejoiced together. The Prince of Life was with us in the valley of the shadow of death; His rod and His staff comforted us; and our souls could understand the meaning of that word which not only says, "Death cannot separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord;" but even puts it among our possessions—"All things are yours, whether life or death; all things are yours, and ye are Christ's, and Christ is God's.”
In the midst of all his joy, and longing to depart, his subjection to the will of God was as marked as throughout his illness. I give one striking instance of it. The usual time for the visit of his medical attendant had nearly come, and he was asked, "Would you not like to see him?" He answered, "No, I should like to be with Jesus;" he paused a moment, he felt that this was impatience, and correcting himself, he added, with much emphasis, "If it be the will of God, OF COURSE.”
We could not always understand what he said, for at times his voice was so thick and indistinct; but the expression of his face was beautiful to the end. His sister Lucy wept bitterly at seeing her precious brother sink so rapidly. I called her to him, and said, "You would not have your sister weep for you, but rejoice I" He nodded his head and smiled sweetly, and putting his arms round her neck, kissed her fondly.
His kind medical attendant came in about this time; he gave him some brandy and water, which a little revived him; but convulsions came on, and his voice grew more indistinct. We had been warned that this would most probably take place before the struggle terminated; and Mr. B— desired my dear wife, on account of her near approaching confinement, not to remain in the apartment. I knew that God was a prayer-hearing God, and that with Him all things were possible; I therefore cried earnestly to Him, that, if it were for His glory, He would graciously spare us this sorrow, and permit the dear sufferer to depart to Him in peace. The Lord, who is very pitiful and of tender mercy, at once heard my cry; the convulsions ceased from that time, and my dear wife was permitted the great comfort and privilege of being with him to the last. We continued to repeat to him, as he was able to bear it, suitable portions of the Word of God, and hymns. The two last hymns to which he listened with evident delight were, "Why do you weep? I am falling asleep," (pp. 51, 52,) and the following, which I had written a few days before, on "The atoning blood of Jesus," that blood which was indeed the source of "all his peace:"—
"When first o'erwhelm'd with guilt and shame,
To Jesus' cross I trembling came;
Burden'd with guilt and full of fear,
Yet, drawn by love, I ventured near;
And pardon found, and peace with God,
In Jesus' rich, atoning blood.
"My sin is gone, my fears are o'er,
I shun God's presence now no more;
He sits upon a throne of grace,
He bids me boldly seek His face;
Sprinkled upon the throne of God,
I see that rich, atoning blood.
"Before His face my Priest appears;
My Advocate the Father hears;
That precious blood before His eyes,
Both day and night for mercy cries;
It speaks, it ever speaks to God,
The voice of that atoning blood.
"By faith that voice I also hear;
It answers doubt, it stills each fear;
Th' accuser seeks in vain to move
The wrath of Hat whose name is Love;
Each charge against the sons of God
Is silenced by th' atoning blood.
"Here I can rest without a fear;
By this to God I now draw near;
By this I triumph over sin;
For this has made and keeps me clean;
And when I reach the throne of God,
I'll praise that rich, atoning blood.”
He smiled sweetly when the blessed words of our Lord were repeated to him, "Father, I will that they also whom thou hast given me be with me where I am;" and again, "Blessed are the dead which die in the Lord, for they rest from their labors.”
The last words he uttered were, "Yes—Pa'—Pa'," in answer to the question if he knew me.
For about two hours he was insensible; no spasms, no suffering; a little difficulty in breathing once or twice; the respiration became slower; at last a slight spasm in the throat; he ceased to breathe. "He was absent from the body, present with the Lord." "Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of His saints.”
We knelt around his bed; many were our tears, but we gave unfeigned, heartfelt thanksgivings and praise to Him who had dealt so tenderly and graciously with the object of our love. We sorrowed, indeed, for we felt our loss but not as those without hope. We knew that to him "death was gain;" and we could look forward with still livelier joy to that blessed day when "those that sleep in Jesus our God shall bring with Him.”
Our prayers, the prayers of his beloved parents, of his friends, and many of God's children, who had continually remembered him before the throne of grace, had indeed been answered. Death had been swallowed up in victory. Dying, to Augustus, had only been going home. The Lord had opened the lips of this young saint to bear testimony to His grace, in words which, I trust, will never be forgotten by any of those who heard them, much less by his brother and sisters, and the companions of his youth.—"Jesus is all my peace."—"May they all come to Jesus, and follow Him more than I have done.”
Augustus was not permitted to spend a long life in the service of God. He was early taken from the evil to come; but the grace of God was greatly magnified in his sickness and death. His patience in suffering, his unmurmuring submission to the will of God, his humiliation under the sense of his past failure and sin, and the unshaken confidence of his soul in the finished work of Jesus, were a spectacle to angels, in which they learned the mighty power of that grace which not only subdues the evil workings of the flesh, but brings forth such rich fruit to the praise and glory of God.
How does such a death-bed scene proclaim the glory of the Cross! What but the knowledge of the precious blood of Christ could give such peace to the awakened conscience! It is true that we may often see sinners leave this world without terror and alarm, who have never felt its cleansing power; but this is only the fulfillment of that word of Scripture, "The wicked have no bands in their death, but their strength is firm." The serpent, who said to our first parents when he tempted them to sin, "Ye shall not surely die," can whisper "Peace, peace, when there is no peace," (Eze. 13:10,10Because, even because they have seduced my people, saying, Peace; and there was no peace; and one built up a wall, and, lo, others daubed it with untempered mortar: (Ezekiel 13:10)) to the self-righteous and the ignorant; and his ministers, transformed as the ministers of righteousness, "who speak a vision of their own heart, and not of the mouth of the Lord," can utter lies in His name, and say, "No evil shall come unto you,"—and the poor, deluded sinner, ignorant of himself, and ignorant of God, may die in a false peace— a peace, it may be, undisturbed—until the worm that dieth not, and the fire that never can be quenched, teach him the terrible realities of unpardoned sin, and the wrath of the Holy, Holy, Holy Lord God Almighty. But such was not the peace that cheered the death-bed of Augustus. He was not self-righteous, he was not self-ignorant, neither did he rest on outward forms and ordinances, or the doctrines and traditions of men. He knew that he was in himself a poor, guilty, lost sinner; but, "being justified by faith, he had peace with God through the Lord Jesus Christ." Rom. 5:11Therefore being justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ: (Romans 5:1). When a child, his soul had been awakened by the terrors of a guilty conscience, and he had trembled at the thought of death then, though it was nothing but joy to him now. This was the secret of his unshaken confidence, "Jesus was ALL his peace." The presence of his Shepherd was with him, the love of God was shed abroad in his heart by the Holy Ghost, and his soul was filled with joy and peace in believing. At that very hour when heart and flesh fail, he found that "God was the strength of his heart," even as he now knows Him as "his portion forever.”
Dear Reader, does not your heart say, as you contemplate the bed of sickness and the dying hours of Augustus, "Let my last end be like his?" Though dead, does not his voice yet speak to your heart, "Jesus is all my peace." Come, then, to the Savior; you can never find true peace to your soul elsewhere. Turn from the lying vanities of this death-stricken and sin-polluted world, to Him who has promised, "Him that cometh to me, I will in no wise cast out." Under the shelter of His cross, you will find rest for your weary soul; and when the sword of judgment passes through this guilty world, you will find peace and salvation; for God has promised, "When I see the blood, I will pass over you, and the plague shall not be upon you to destroy you, when I smite the land of Egypt." Exod. 12:1313And the blood shall be to you for a token upon the houses where ye are: and when I see the blood, I will pass over you, and the plague shall not be upon you to destroy you, when I smite the land of Egypt. (Exodus 12:13). Then "Jesus will be all your pew.'