SOME few years ago a young farmer walked into my consulting room, looking worn and nervous, and with all the appearance of having undergone great mental anxiety. He complained of having lost his sleep, that his appetite for food had in great measure left him, and that he was subject to attacks of palpitation of the heart.
After hearing his tale of bodily suffering, I wrote him a prescription, and he had risen to take his leave, when I said, "You have been telling me the story of your bodily sufferings, but what about your soul? Do you know anything of the Lord and His salvation?”
I can never forget the smile of holy joy and peace that immediately lighted up his face as he again seated himself, and said, "Ah, sir, thank God I can now say that my soul is resting on Jesus; but as you have spoken to me on that subject, I must tell you that the agonies of conviction I have gone through have broken up my bodily health, and brought me to seek advice from you this day.”
“How were you awakened to a sense of your lost condition; and what means did God use to bring you to a knowledge of the Saviour?”
Sir," he replied," I was a godless, thoughtless young man, living for pleasure, and in sin, running after the world's vanities; spending my leisure moments with companions like-minded, in the dance and the song and the public-house, heedless of God or eternity, and never feeling my need of salvation.
“I worked on my uncle's farm, who cared nothing as long as I did my duty. One day I heard, as if it were the voice of God speaking to me, the words, You are going to hell and eternal ruin.' I shook and trembled. My soul was in agony. Night and day the words haunted me, You are going to hell,' The horrors of the pit of woe were then before my mind.
“I tried to get away from them, but in vain-sleep left me. I tossed all night in mental agony upon my bed. I tried hard to drown my thoughts by dissipation. I went to the tavern and the dance, but they were like oil poured upon the fire of my soul. I then thought I would turn over a new leaf, and gain peace and relief to my soul by being religious. I began to attend church, to read my prayers, and to be regular at all the services. But all I did only seemed to make my condition worse, and I was almost driven to despair.
“Being advised to seethe minister, I called upon him. He asked me what was the matter with me. Oh, sir,' I said, can you tell me how I am to be saved from hell? '
“My good fellow,' he replied, do your duty, attend your church, say your prayers, and be regular at Holy Communion, and you may hope to get saved.'
Sir,' I said, I have done all that, but I can get no peace. My sleep is gone, and I am in agony. Can you not help me to get salvation? '
“My good fellow, you are unnecessarily anxious; I can only tell you to follow your religious duties.'
“I found it was of no use talking to him, so I left—my misery more than I could bear. Just then I heard of another minister in the neighborhood as a godly man, so I went to him, and poured out the anguish of my soul before him.
“He listened to my story, and assured that God had begun a good work in me, said, My young friend, the Spirit of God has convicted you of sin, and shown you your lost condition, that He may lead you to the Saviour. You have not gone to the only source of pardon, the precious blood of the Lord Jesus Christ shed upon Calvary more than 1800 years ago, but you have been trying to save yourself, and make yourself better; and surely in that way you never can get peace. God settled with His own Eternal Son on the cross for your sins, when He laid them on Him 1800 years ago. He who died for your sins and was your substitute in death, is now in glory.'
“Blessed be God, in a moment I saw it all. I had been trying to get rid of my sins, which God had forever put away on the cross of His own Son. My soul got rest and joy at once in believing.”
“Blessed be God," I said, "for His great love and mercy to you.”
“Yes, sir," he replied, "but my health was dreadfully shattered, and the minister advised me to come into the town to see you.”
He came back in about a month, much renovated in health, and his soul rejoicing in God his Saviour. But he told me he thought he must leave his situation, as his relatives refused to keep him unless he gave up his beloved Saviour.
After this I did not see him for more than a year. Great was our joy then, as we spoke together of our Saviour's dying love for us and of our joyous hope of His coming again.
I have shortly detailed this touching story as one of the many instances of cases in which our loving God and Saviour, in His own way and in His own time, without any of the outward ordinary means, seeks out and brings to Himself His own lost wandering sheep. To Him be all the glory! R. D.