SUSI E had been at school for about five years when she began to ask the question that stands as the heading of this chapter. She was twelve years old, but so small that strangers never guessed her real age. She was a first class girl, now "quite an old scholar," as she often told those who understood her silent language. And it was among her classmates the loving service that did so much to make the last years of her life bright and happy was begun.
Quarrels sometimes took place in the playground. After Susie's conversion she always took the part of a peacemaker, going first to one then to the other of those who had disagreed, begging them, often with tears, to forgive each other and be friends; telling them, too, in her simple way, that it would grieve the Lord Jesus if they were unkind or angry. And as most of the girls loved Susie, and did not like to see her unhappy, her attempts at putting an end to quarrels were often a success. And then, I am sure, it was the peace Jesus gives to those who trust Him that not only filled her heart, but gave her face the bright, happy look it so often wore.
As I know that many of you, my dear young readers, have not left school, I really must stop to ask you a question. Are you shining for Jesus? those of you who love Him, I mean, for if you have not come to Him for salvation, each one for him or herself, you do not care to please or serve Him, though some people seem to make a strange kind of mistake just here, and try to put working for Christ before coming to Him. I remember once having quite a long talk with an old lady who was doing it. Bessie says, "Will I please tell her all about it?" I will, as nearly as I can; but it was a very long time ago, and perhaps I may not remember quite all we said.
It was a lovely evening in early spring. I was going by omnibus from one part of London to another, when at one of the stopping-places all the inside passengers, except myself and an old lady, got out. We had not traveled far together before I had the opportunity of doing her a little kindness. A very small thing it was, but not too small to be used in the Lord's hand as a key by which the long-closed door of a lonely, sorrowful heart was to be opened to the sweet message of the gospel.
After looking at me a few moments in silence, the lady, whose name I do not know, asked me such a strange question. I think some of you would have been as much surprised as I was. It was not the words so much as the manner in which they were said that for a moment almost startled me.
“Did you ever try to do good to any one and get no thanks for it?" my companion asked. For a moment I did not answer. Now a moment we know is a very short space of time, but it was long enough for me to remember that the One who is spoken of in the Book of Proverbs by the name of "Wisdom" had said: "Counsel is mine." (See chap. 8:14.) Time enough, too, to own Him as my Lord and Master, and to ask Him to teach me what to say.
So my answer was, "Perhaps I have sometimes; but I think it was a test as to whether I did it to please myself or the One to whom I owe everything, the Lord Jesus Christ,”
“I really do not understand you," my fellow traveler replied, with a sad, anxious look. "You talk about pleasing Christ just as if you knew Him well enough to be sure what He would like. Now, I never did anything to please Him in my life, and I should not know how or where to begin.”
“You cannot serve Christ until you know Him as a Savior," I replied. "Please do not be angry with me for asking a very plain question-but have you come to Him as a sinner, owning your need of salvation?”
Her face and voice were very full of trouble as she said, "I do not think I know what you mean by coming to Jesus. Now if you asked me if I read my Bible, I should be able to answer Yes; for I have read the New Testament over and over again, and, I think the life and death of Christ, as we get it in the four gospels, very wonderful and beautiful. How kind He was to everyone, and how noble His forgiveness of His enemies was. But I cannot say I quite understand you.”
"None but Jesus can do helpless sinners good.”
She looked up, her whole manner changing, and said, "Oh, do say those words to me again. I have heard them before, but it is a very long time since, I think almost twenty years. My youngest son had been in a very low way for some time. He could not rest at nights, but used to walk up and down his room for hours at a time, wringing his hands and crying to God to have mercy upon him. And he used to talk so strangely, too, telling us that he was a great sinner and deserved to go to hell, till his brothers thought he was going out of his mind and wanted me to have him put in the asylum. But he came to himself quite suddenly, saying the words you repeated. And he seemed so happy, and told us he was a saved man, and that God, for Christ's sake, had forgiven all his sins. He went abroad soon after, but he writes me such long, loving letters, and your words have made me think of what he said.”
Our journey was at an end, so we said "Good-bye." I have not met her since, but I often think of our conversation, and wonder if, through the blessing of the Lord, it was the means of leading a weary one to turn to Him who said, "Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest." (Matt. 11:2828Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. (Matthew 11:28).)
Susie was much interested in being told about the poor children of India by a teacher who was leaving B. to take charge of a mission school in that far-off land. She seemed much troubled on hearing that great numbers of Hindu children did not know anything about the true God, but prayed to idols, saying, on her fingers, "Oh, do tell them about the Lord Jesus Christ, and I will pray to Him for you and for all the girls who attend your school." She then asked if any deaf and dumb children would be among the scholars? And on being told it was very likely, as the number of deaf mutes in India is very large, asked if she might send her favorite doll to some Indian girl afflicted in the same way as herself, and was quite delighted when told it should be packed with some books, toys, and other things friends were sending for the mission school, and given with Susie's love to a deaf and dumb child.
I never heard who received the English doll as a present, but writing about Susie's doll reminds me of how much interest I took in a doll only a few days ago. I had been to see an old man who was very ill, suffering great pain from a terrible disease called cancer. He had been ill for a long time, and not able to do any work, so his wife and he were very poor; but I am so glad I can tell you that they both knew the Lord Jesus as their own precious Savior, so there was peace and even joy in that humble home. An orphan grandchild who lives with them, and whose name is Edith, was always much pleased with my visits, and would run to meet me, take my hand in hers, and nestle close up to my side She was very fond of learning easy texts and verses of hymns, and would repeat them in a way that, though a very little girl only six years old, she had begun to think about the meaning of the words.
I had been several times, before I found out that my little friend had not got a doll, though she wished very much for one. My first thought was to buy and dress a doll for Edith. But as I walked home I thought of some girls I know who are quite rich in toys, and who, I felt sure, would like to help me in making Edith a very happy little girl.
Her story was soon told, and it was a real cheer to see in what a loving, wholehearted way Louie, Lottie, Ethel, and Amy set to work. Amy, who will be ten next birthday, said she was getting too old to play with dolls and should not want hers any more, so asked her mamma if she might send her best doll. Permission being given, her sisters dressed it in a very pretty and tasteful way. Edith has a doll now, and I am sure Amy and her sisters have tasted something of the sweetness and joy of doing something for others, remembering, I trust, the words of the Lord Jesus how He said, "It is more blessed to give than to receive." (Acts 20:3535I have showed you all things, how that so laboring ye ought to support the weak, and to remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how he said, It is more blessed to give than to receive. (Acts 20:35).)