How good it would be if He came tonight!" At the sound of voices I looked up from the book I was reading. "If who came tonight?" I wondered. Were we about to have company?
Then I realized that they were speaking of Jesus and my instant reaction was, "Oh, no! It would not be good if He came tonight. I am not ready to meet Him!"
I knew well that Jesus is coming back again, and I knew that only those whose sins are forgiven will go to be with Him and that those who are not ready will be left behind for judgment. But—"coming tonight!" Somehow I hadn't even thought that possible. And as for death, I was young and would live for many years.
After thinking it over for a few minutes I decided, "There's plenty of time," and turned back to my book. But I could not get interested in it again; the words, "Coming tonight! Coming tonight!" kept ringing in my ears.
Those words just stayed with me, and instead of getting rid of the feeling I began to realize the danger I was in. I used to think I was no worse than others, and a great deal better than some, and though I knew I was not saved I really meant to be—some day. But what if that were true: He's coming tonight! Many nights I lay awake, afraid to go to sleep for fear that Jesus should come in the night and leave me behind.
I went to a gospel meeting. Usually I had been glad to slip away as quickly as possible, but that night I listened to every word as if for my life. Afterward a man said to me, "Do you know Jesus?"
I admitted that I didn't, but said I would like to!
He opened the Bible and read: He was wounded for [my] transgressions, He was bruised for [my] iniquities: the chastisement of [my] peace was upon Him; and with His stripes [I am] healed. (Isa. 53:55But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed. (Isaiah 53:5).)
That night I learned that Jesus had died, but I could not say that I was saved. I tried to feel saved, and to act saved, but I did not really know. This went on for weeks. On Sundays I was hoping; on Mondays I was doubting. At last I was almost despairing of ever knowing the peace I longed for.
Finally I shut myself in my room and told Jesus I had tried to make myself better and I had failed. Would He just take me as I was? As I knelt there in the deep consciousness that I was in the presence of God, the words from Isaiah came into my mind: I have called thee by thy name; thou art Mine. (Isa. 43:11But now thus saith the Lord that created thee, O Jacob, and he that formed thee, O Israel, Fear not: for I have redeemed thee, I have called thee by thy name; thou art mine. (Isaiah 43:1).)
This time I did not doubt; I just believed God. Joy—such joy as I cannot describe nor can you understand unless you have experienced it yourself—filled my heart. I wanted everybody to know that Jesus was my very own personal Savior!
Now I know more surely than ever that Jesus is coming, coming soon, but still in love and mercy He is waiting for you to come to Him and trust Him also.