CAPTAIN C―and Miss— had become most intimate friends through meeting each other at church and mission meetings. This friendship so soon deepened into real love, that it was felt by both that their earthly happiness depended on it culminating in marriage.
Sometime previous to this friendship being formed Miss― had been truly converted to God; and as Captain C―took an interest in religious matters, she concluded he must be a Christian also. In this, however, she was deceived, as she afterward learned to her deep sorrow.
Months passed by before ever she suspected that his religion was nothing more than a mere form. But once her suspicions were aroused, she had not long to wait till they were confirmed by his own lips, in answer to her following pointed questions: “Have you ever been really converted? and when did it take place?”
These questions brought from him the confession that he knew nothing of such a change, and did not see any need for it in his case. “What harm is there,” he said, “in having a glass of spirits or beer, and a little jollification with my friends at times, when I don’t let these things make me forget my religion. I never miss a meeting, as you know, that you go to.”
The discovery that his religion was only an outward show and sham was to the one whose affections he had won a most dreadful shock. All her hopes of a life of happiness on earth seemed dashed to the ground. “How can we live happy together, as he is not saved?” she said to herself. “Besides, the Bible says a Christian is only to ‘marry IN THE LORD,’ and not be ‘UNEQUALLY yoked together with unbelievers’ (1 Cor. 7:39; 2 Cor. 6:14). Oh! if I had only asked him at first if he was converted, I should have been saved from all this sorrow.”
From this time she set herself to pray earnestly to God for him, and lost no chance of speaking faithfully to him of his need of salvation, and pled affectionately with him to come to Christ. But all seemed in vain.
It was not, however, till all hope was gone of bringing their friendship to its desired issue, consistent with faithfulness to the Lord, that she sat down to write her farewell letter, intimating, in most affectionate terms, that their present friendship must close, but her love for him would not let her cease to pray to God for his salvation.
So deeply affected was he by her letter that he soon after left England, intending never to plant his foot again on the shores of his native land.
The next three years of his life were spent as an officer on board a steamer trading between ports on the Chinese coast. During this period he passed through an exercise of soul never to be forgotten. The cliffs of “old England” had just faded from view when the Spirit of God began to work in his soul, showing him his true condition as a lost, guilty sinner. Like many a sin-convicted sinner, he set about reforming his ways, in the hope of meriting the favor of God, and thus finding peace for his now troubled soul.
He was not many months, however, on this track till he found peace was unattainable on such lines, for each evening found him further and further from his goal. He rose each morning with the best of resolutions formed for the day, but night always found him crushed under the sense of having broken them. To use his own words to the writer, “It was one continuous experience of sinning and repenting alternately,” till be gave up all hope of ever getting God’s forgiveness, or being able to live a Christian life. Then the thought took entire possession of his mind that he must have committed the “unpardonable sin” he had heard others speak of. From this point he tried hard to keep God, death, judgment, and eternity out of his thoughts, as his awful dread of either made him tremble.
The sense, too, that he now had of his own vileness made him shudder at the thought of having deceived so long, by a false profession of religion, a woman so virtuous as Miss —, and also the thought that a life like hers had been so nearly thrown away on a wretch like him.
In this state he remained till one day he felt compelled, by some unseen power, to go to a service held at a British China Mission Station in the port where his vessel was lying. The service he felt had little or no interest for him except to give him the deeper conviction that he was outside―and would always be so―of the circle of Christian blessedness.
On leaving the meeting, he was followed by the missionary, who shook hands with him, and after making a few kindly inquiries as to his name, ship, native place, &c., expressed a desire to accompany him to the ship side, to which a glad consent was given, and the following conversation ensued: ―
“Well, how did you enjoy the service?”
“As well, I daresay, as anyone in my state could.”
“What do you mean by that? Have you no interest in these things?”
“How can I have an interest in them when they are not for me?”
“But would you not like to be a Christian?”
“Like to be a Christian? No one would like better, if there had been the least chance of my being one; but I am shut out of all hope of ever being such, for I have sinned the ‘unpardonable sin’ against God. So you see it’s no use of me ever thinking of such a thing as religion now.”
“Then you believe you are too great a sinner to be saved?”
“I’m sure I am.”
“You suppose then that had you lived a better life there would have been a chance for you?”
“I do.”
“Well, now, will you kindly tell me what kind of people Christ died for?”
“Sinners, to be sure.”
“He died for sinners, you say. Now, what are you?”
“What am I? Why, you need not ask that; I am a poor lost sinner.”
“Well, then, if Christ died for sinners, and you are a lost sinner, do you not know someone that He must have died for?”
He was silent for some time, and then exclaimed, “He must have died for ME,” Then with all the ecstasy of a soul just passed from darkness to LIGHT, he continued― “I SEE IT! I SEE IT! Praise the Lord, I AM SAVED NOW!”
Happy man. He laid his head on his pillow that night for the first time, assured that all his sins were borne by Jesus on the cross, and were therefore not now on him, but all forgiven (1 John 2:12).
Next day he was put to the test by his fellow-officers asking him, after their duties were over, to go and have a glass, and a little jollification, as formerly. The Lord gave him strength to say, “No, I am going to the mission tonight instead.”
Somewhat startled, they said, “What’s come over you?”
“Well, I was there last night, and by a talk with the missionary, I have got what I have for long thought I was too bad for―the salvation of my soul.”
This sudden change was more than they had expected, and somewhat took the breath from them, until, after a minute or two’s silence, during which they looked at their changed fellow-officer, and then at each other with amazement, one of them stepped forward and shook hands with him, congratulating him on his “great find,” as he termed it, wished him every success, and hoped he would stick to it. All the others went through the same form, bade him “Good-night,” and left.
From that moment companionship with them Was ended. As a “Christian,” he could have no fellowship with them in their ways, and as “men of the world” they felt they could have no fellowship with him, as his presence was only a check to the pursuit of their pleasures.
Sometime subsequent to this, he secured an engagement on a vessel belonging to the Japanese Government, but had not been many months on board his new vessel till a strong desire to visit his old friend the missionary took possession of him, and the way being soon opened up, he embraced his first chance of doing so. On arriving, he made straight for the mission, and after the happy Christian greetings were past, the missionary handed him several letters, which had been lying awaiting his arrival―the missionary having detained them for some time, expecting he must be coming soon, owing to the letters being addressed there. Amongst these, to his glad surprise, was one from his old, true, and affectionate friend, Miss—, expressing her delight at the good news that had reached her, through some friends of the missionary in England, about his conversion, and pressed him to come home without delay, as all hindrance to their union was now removed.
The news seemed almost too good to be true. “Can it be possible,” he said to himself, “that all these years I have been away she has kept true in her love to me, after the way I refused all her entreaties to come to Christ? All this time, as she says in her letter, she has been praying for me, and from the day I left never gave up hopes of God answering her prayers.”
On reflection, how clearly he could now see the gracious hand of God in all His dealings with him, since he bade adieu to England, in answer to the prayers of his truest earthly friend. He needed no further persuasion, to go back; and as he was then free from all marine engagements, he had only to tarry till a home-bound vessel was in port, and for this he had only to wait a few, days, when he embarked with a heart filled with brightest prospects for time and eternity.
The sea voyage past, he lost no time in reaching the presence of the one who soon after became his happy wife, and fellow-heir of “the grace of life” (1 Peter 3:7), enjoying the reward of her faithfulness both to the Lord and the earthly object of her affections.
The foregoing narrative of God’s gracious dealings with a poor sinner on the one hand, and with a faithful and tried saint on the other, is sent forth in these pages in the hope that God may be pleased to use it for the salvation of some sinner, and for the encouragement of His tried and faithful children.
ANON.