Perhaps by this point, you are mightily discouraged. How will I ever find a suitable companion? It is not my desire to discourage, but rather, “that it may be well with thee” (Ruth 3:1). Keep in mind: you won’t find a perfect spouse. We are not perfect — yes, in Christ we are — but until we depart this scene, the flesh is still very much in us.
Even if one were to execute everything flawlessly, we should not expect a trouble-free marriage. “If thou marry, thou hast not sinned; and if a virgin marry, she hath not sinned. Nevertheless such shall have trouble in the flesh” (1 Cor. 7:28). A marriage is something we make. Life doesn’t end with the last page of the novel, or when the credits roll; that’s just the beginning. In some ways the easy part is over and the real challenges lie ahead. Unless you’ve prayed about this, unless you’ve thought this through, unless you’ve planned together for this, and sought the advice of others, you are going to be in for some unfortunate surprises. It’s a little late to seek God’s direction after marriage. Yes, we pray together in marriage, but if we’ve waited until then, we’ve waited too long. Prayer is not a substitute for poor planning; prayer is an integral part of the whole process. Start praying now.
A good marriage is an investment, but it will pay rich dividends. It is an investment in time, in communication, and, most importantly, spiritual growth together. Providing Christ is the center of the relationship, and there is a sense of love and good will one toward the other, differences and difficulties can be overcome.