THE difference between looking to feelings within and to an object without, is a subject with which every evangelist is painfully familiar. No matter how long he may have been in the field, how large his experience, or how well acquainted with the subject, he must go over it again and again, with every fresh convert. There is no direct or royal road to peace with God according to the experience of anxious souls. However direct or plain the way may be in scripture, it is made most circuitous through the unbelief of the human heart and the subtlety of Satan. It is a rare thing for a soul to be turned completely away from itself to Christ when first awakened. Hence the unspeakable importance of personal conversation with experienced Christians by all such when first awakened. It might save them years of trouble afterward.
Nearly all newly awakened souls judge of their state before God by their feelings. They cannot understand how they can be different in God's sight to what they feel themselves to be. Hence their faith is governed by their feelings. They believe just what they feel to be true to them-that they are as good or as bad as they feel. Still, thank God, the soul is awakened, it is anxious, and Satan can no longer lull it to sleep as before; it will not be quiet, it is troubled, it wants rest; it wants to be sure of salvation. And the one grand object of the enemy now is to throw the anxious one off the true ground of faith and in upon itself-to be guided by feelings in place of the word of God. And so successful is this snare, that few escape its toils, and multitudes are entangled therein and held in bondage for years, though this ought never to be, surely. Still, it is the Lord, and the Lord only, that can speak peace to a troubled soul and give it to enjoy full deliverance. He only can say, " Loose him and let him go." But this brings me to the following simple incident from real life, which is the occasion of this paper.
On a Lord's day afternoon in a town hall in the country, not long ago, a person was introduced to me by a christian friend, as anxious about her soul. I found it to be a chronic case of feelings with very little intelligence about Christ, His work, or the word of God, but most sincere and earnest. My point was, that Christ could not be more willing to receive her to-morrow than to-day, His word could not be truer, or His work more complete; therefore, why not come now, believe and rejoice? The appeal in the afternoon for instant decision for Christ, was founded on these two words, " Come now;" which had greatly interested her, and presented a new line of truth to her mind Like most of this class, she would be ready to own that all she had heard was true, and that she did not doubt a word of it, but it was not true to her because she did not feel it; she was waiting to expel once that change within, which would be her warrant for believing that it was true to her. She acknowledged that she had been waiting for this inward change for years. Hardly anything can be more discouraging or hopeless to an evangelist than this, for the lives of such are generally most blameless; there is conscience enough to make them religious. After pointing out her mistake and assuring her that all her darkness arose from looking to herself in place of Christ, and from trusting to feedings in place of His finished work, we parted. She was back again in the evening, but I did not see her.
The following day her christian neighbor, who had induced her to come to the preaching, let me know that the woman I had spoken to had found peace with God, and that she would like to see me. With the assistance of a friend I found her humble home. We had scarcely entered when she began to speak of the blessing she had received on Lord's day: but all I will give in her own words is the following. " When I awoke on Monday morning, at five o'clock, the thought came into my mind, I have an object now-I have an object now." And spreading her hand over her breast, she added, " I used to think I must feel it all in here first, but now it's all in Christ; and often to-day when I was at my work it came into my mind."
From the simplicity of the woman, it was perfectly evident that she had no idea that she was saying anything particular; it was the truthful expression of her new experience. But, nevertheless, these few simple words went straight home to my heart, clothed with light and power. They contain truths of the very deepest and highest practical instruction and value. There is not a troubled conscience in Christendom that would not find peace in looking to that same blessed object; not a doubting heart that would not be settled; not a weary soul that would not find rest; not a lost soul that would not find salvation. True, we read, " Look unto me and be ye saved.... Come unto me and I will give you rest.... Hear, and your soul shall live.... Only believe." But the power-the healing virtue-is not in the looking, the coming, the hearing, the believing; but all in the object-the heavenly Christ, the man in the glory. When the eye rests on Him as its one object, all doubts and darkness flee away. The midnight of the soul is exchanged for the brightness of the noonday sun. Now the eye is single, having but one object, and the whole body is full of light. " They looked unto him and were lightened, and their faces were not ashamed " Psa. 34:5.
These are some of the immediate and necessary results of looking to Jesus in place of self. The feelings cease to be the center of importance, and the blessed Lord, the exalted man in the glory, becomes the new object of the eye-the new center of our thoughts, feelings, affections, ways, and worship. All is changed, but the change is deep and all-prevailing. And as we grow in our knowledge of Christ, the results are infinite By degrees, if the eye is fixed on its heavenly object, we enter into the fullness of Christ as the measure of our own blessing We know our place in the presence of God according to the acceptance of Christ Himself-we are accepted in the beloved, and have settled peace with God. And now, the feelings, so long looked for and waited for, are come. But how? By making self the center-by some felt change within? Ah no; but by looking to Jesus and believing the word of God. The only thing that can produce the feelings so much desired is the written word-" Thus it is written"-but until the word is believed, the feelings can never be experienced. But now when the eye rests on its new object, the Holy
Spirit is free to reveal the grace and truth of Christ to the soul. Light breaks in on the mind, the truth of God fills the heart, and new joy overflows the whole soul.
It is no longer with the anxious one, " If I could only feel it I would believe," but, " I see all in Jesus now. When I am looking up to Him, so many things come into my mind which move my heart with deep emotion and fill my eyes with tears of joy. How can I think of His wondrous love in coming down from heaven to die for me, without being thus deeply moved? I think of His sufferings on the cross, of His crown of thorns, but chiefly of His love which nothing could turn aside, which carried Him through everything, which only became the stronger as the pressure from all sides increased." Such are the sweet and tender breathings of first love when the blessed Jesus covers the eyes and fills the heart.