Paddington, September 8th, 1876.
My Dear——, I have written little from this side to that (of the earth) where you are, partly from pressure of duties around me; and while was in that hemisphere I thought affection had an object large and worthy enough to be satisfied with in him. Latterly pressure of calls, and inability to say anything about my probable movements, have stopped me, and do still; for while my heart may turn to New Zealand and Melbourne, &c., I have not been able to say I have any thought that is His mind. His will be done, is my wish any and every way; and it shall be done, please God, whether I wait on here, or, having light, rise to follow it out as to Him Defective as our perception and judgment may be, we yet have to live to Christ, and if called on to die to Him. This supposes reality in us, and sets aside plans which grow out of self having in us too large a place, and so open the way for the adversary, and for worldliness. But if, " Speak, Lord, and let thy servant hear," be the real language of our hearts, then we can do as unto the Lord, or tarry till we see what we can do as to Him. I find more and more the value of that word, " Enoch walked with God." I daresay in doing it he had his difficulties; but he did it. And to us 2 Cor. 5:1515And that he died for all, that they which live should not henceforth live unto themselves, but unto him which died for them, and rose again. (2 Corinthians 5:15) puts the truth in a way to aid us to live to Him, not to ourselves, but to Him-the Anointed Man, alive from the dead, the object of our faith, lives, and hope.
Mr. D writes from Canada that the work has opened so fast there and in U.S. that he does not know when he can come back; if before winter, then (D.V.) to return there in spring. Numbers appear to have got free from the—-, and to be now at the table-this in Canada. In the States several of them open to the work, and to laborers in them lately enlightened, and that makes the field wide. Since above,——sends me yours to him to read. A letter of mine to you appears from him not to have reached you, and I fear two. The first is my recognition of your first envoy of Matthew to me, with which I wrote you fully; second, I think I must have written to you, and——about——. But of this I am not clear. I find I have to abandon the thought of using that MS.-the Bagsters, who I thought might take it up, are not free to do so. And as to myself I desire to cease from all work, save that of waiting on the Lord, and His serving saints, and the saints, and the gospel. But though I say " I desire " (which is true), He seems to will it; so that my desire is the result of subjection of will to Himself writes depressedly as to the closed door in Ireland. But to my mind he forgets; first, that spring is only one of four seasons; secondly, perhaps (and I think so) that the other hemisphere is for the time his sphere of action. He is very dear to me, and may mature into a very valuable laborer. England is overstocked with runners and preaching. They asked me at one place to preach; I could not give the day named; I named another, and found they had been eight weeks ahead arranged for! The young men who go out are many too many. But what " I find to do here" is rather the frame of their minds than " Here am I, send me," in answer to the Lord's, " Who will go for us? " (Isa. 6)
I send you a little token of the Lord's remembrance of you. To my mind you are in your right hemisphere, and I hope I shall find you walking in it in all simplicity, if the Lord permits me as now " the aged " to come and see what He has wrought, in what He has used you. Oh for more of the Spirit of Christ-of Paul, who sought the parts beyond, and loved to labor where others would not! Several times I have seen this in J. N. D. I have said perhaps, " Whither do you go now? " And he has answered, " I wait, and let others decide where they will go, and take what they leave." This seems to me as it should be.
Should you be surprised if the Lord let me walk in where you are?
Most affectionately, G. V. W.