THE beloved subject of this memoir, Augustus James Clarke, was born at Bangalore, in the East Indies, on the 22nd of May 1831. Both his parents are Christians, who adorned the doctrine of their God and Savior in a land where His name is so often blasphemed among the heathen by the inconsistencies of those who profess it. Their house was opened to all who loved and followed their blessed Master; and many, who for His name's sake have gone forth among the heathen, could bear witness of their charity, like that of the beloved Gaius of old, in receiving them, that they might be fellow-helpers to the truth. They were praying parents; they desired first for their children the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and that they might be brought up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.
It was at Bangalore, in the year 1829, that I first became acquainted with these beloved Mends. While I was absent on field-service, their house was my dear wife's home, and she was present at the birth of Augustus, their eldest son. She was the first who held him in her arms when he entered into this world of sin and sorrow, little anticipating at that time that she would for eight years watch over him, in the absence of his own dear parents, with a mother's care and love; and that, fourteen years after, she would smoothed his dying pillow, and witness his triumphant departure to that Savior who had washed him from his sins in His own blood.
We returned to England, on account of the failure of my health, in 1835; and in 1837, our dear friends sent us their two eldest children, Lucy and Augustus, desiring to have them educated with our own. We undertook this solemn responsibility with trembling hearts, trusting in His sufficiency alone, whose strength is made perfect in weakness; and being encouraged by the assurance, that while we were watching over them in England, their own parents were day and night remembering them and us before the mercy-seat. When Augustus arrived, he was rather more than six years old. His natural disposition had many fine loveable features in it; he was very open and generous, full of the most tender affection, and his bright hazel eye beamed with ardor and intelligence; but his heart was, as yet, ignorant both of the depths of its own wickedness, and the deeper riches of the grace of God. Its natural corruption chewed itself in many of his words and ways; and often, with aching hearts, we had to speak to him of the exceeding sinfulness of sin in the sight of that God who is of purer eyes than to look upon iniquity; while we also told him of the grace and love of that Savior, who came to save His people from their sins.
There is scarcely a deeper sorrow to one who has tasted that the Lord is gracious, next to the discovery of the evil of his own heart, than the manifestation of it in the ways of those who are dear to us; but God, in His rich grace, turns even this to blessing; it stirred us up to cry more earnestly to Him for this dear child, whom we loved as if he were our own: and He heard our cry. He answered the prayers of his beloved parents in India; and He heard the cry of those who were now watching over him in their absence, and turned him to Himself. He convinced him of his sins, and gave him peace by faith in the precious blood of Jesus.
Augustus was naturally of a delicate constitution, and subject to attacks of croup. In one of these attacks, his conscience became awakened; he was filled with fear and alarm—he saw that he had sinned against God, that he deserved His anger—he felt afraid to die—his sins lay heavy upon his soul. He cried with the jailer, "What must I do to be saved?" I spoke to him of Jesus, the Lamb of God; of God's love in providing such a sacrifice; of the love of Jesus in laying down His life for sinners; of the preciousness of His blood in the sight of God; His finished work and spotless righteousness; that all this was for sinners as sinners. The Lord opened his heart to believe the glad tidings of His love; and he was soon enabled to find rest and peace, by faith in that precious blood which cleanseth from all sin. This peace, he told me on his deathbed, he never afterward lost; for it was founded, not upon his own worthiness, but upon the perfect finished work of Christ. This is, indeed, the only resting-place of faith "which never alters, never varies, and is always the same before God." Nothing can be added to it. It is everlasting in its duration and efficacy. His blood is a constant propitiation, His righteousness a perfect covering. This alone can purge the conscience, silence the accusations of Satan, and give peace in the presence of a holy God; and, I may add, give real tenderness of heart and conscience in our walk and conversation. Where there is not this confidence, sin is looked at rather with reference to its consequences to ourselves, than its wickedness and evil against God. Nothing makes sin so hateful and detestable, as a living faith in that blood, which, while it puts it away forever, teaches us at the same time its exceeding sinfulness, in that nothing but the shedding of it could blot it out.
From the time of his conversion, there were many things which gave us comfort and joy. His love towards God's poor children, shown in many acts of self-denial, that he might have to give to their necessities; subjection to the Word; and tenderness of heart and conscience, when he had sinned against the Lord: while there were other things which often grieved us. I write this little memoir of this beloved child—whom I loved as dearly as if he were my own, "for in Christ Jesus I had begotten him through the gospel," 1 COR 4.,—not to exalt him, but the grace of God towards him; and therefore I mention not only the fruit to the Lord which gladdened us, but the sin which humbled us, though it called forth the exceeding riches of His grace. There is a point connected with this, which I desire to submit to the consideration of Christian parents and believers in general, with respect to the conversion of children. I believe that those who have experienced the grace of God after they have proved the vanity and evil of the world, do not sufficiently sympathize with those who are converted before they have had the same bitter experience as themselves. Many of us have drank, and deeply too, of Babylon's intoxicating cup. We have lived long in the "far country," and eaten of its dainties and husks. The grace that brought salvation, met us, and turned us from proved vanity to "the living God:" but the young have not learned by experience, as we have; the world, which is open to them, as they grow in years, holds out apparent promises and attractions to their eyes, which it has ceased to have in ours. We ought to bear this in mind in dealing with the lambs of Christ's flock; for it would lead us to more prayerfulness, and greater tenderness and forbearance with them. The good Shepherd gathers the lambs in
The following extracts of letters written by Augustus to his beloved father, in the year 1841, when he was only ten years old, and in 1842, will show the simple confidence of his soul in the blood of Jesus, and some of the early conflicts through which he passed from the plague and evil of his own heart.
"ROCK COTTAGE, Mara 30, 1841.
“You will rejoice to hear that the Lord has given me faith in Him; that I am one of the lambs of Jesus, bought with His blood. It is indeed a blessed and happy thing to believe in Him. I wish, dear Papa, to break bread, for our blessed Lord has commanded us to do so. Once I was dead in sins, but He has quickened me. I feel that I am a vile, lost, undone, wicked sinner, and nothing but that blood could have cleansed me. I feel, if God justly rewarded me, I would have (been) in hell long ago. I am not afraid of death, for I know that if I were to die I would go to be with Jesus; still, dear Papa, I should like to live, no longer to please myself, but to please and glorify Him.”
“ROCK COTTAGE, September 30, 1841.
I tell you again, dear Papa, that Jesus has taken me and washed me in His precious blood, and made (me) one of His dear lambs, who hear His voice and follow Him. I wish and indeed pray daily that He would enable me to do so more; and yet I often give way to much that does not please but grieve His Holy Spirit, and my heart is often too proud to go and ask God to enable me to resist them, whenever I find them rising; for we know Peter failed, because he did not watch and pray.”
“ROCS COTTAGE. May 30, 1842.
“Dearest Papa, I have lived Eleven Years (alluding to his birthday, on the 22nd of the above month) in this wicked world. It gave me great joy to think that you and dear Mamma were praying for me. I would desire to bless the Lord for all His mercies to me. He has indeed been good to me, saved me from death, and given me Christian parents, who love me, and desire that I should be one of Jesus' dear little lambs; and above all, He has given me His own Son from heaven—Oh, what love indeed!!! We do long to see you all again; but we know if it is not the will of God we should meet here below, we shall meet in heaven, where we shall never, never part!!! I send you two sweet texts in Latin 'Ego sum pastor bonus, et cog nosco meas, et cognoscor a meis. Sicut novit me Pater, et ego agnosco Patrem: et animam mean?, pono pro vobis.' —John 10:14, 1514I am the good shepherd, and know my sheep, and am known of mine. 15As the Father knoweth me, even so know I the Father: and I lay down my life for the sheep. (John 10:14‑15).”
I pass over the history of this dear child until the 30th of April 1843, when he met with an accident, from the consequences of which he never wholly recovered— the loss of his left eye. It happened on Saturday afternoon, under remarkable circumstances. Augustus had been invited to C—, with his brothers and sisters. I feared lest the vanities of that fashionable place should draw away his heart further from the Lord, for he had not been walking near Him; and I cried to the Lord, that if He saw that the visit would not be for his good, He would prevent it—little thinking what the manner of the answer to my prayer would be. As our whole family were going to W—on the following Monday, we had arranged to travel so far on our way together. I was busy packing up-stairs, when Miss B—, our governess, ran to me, crying, "O Mr Deck, poor Augustus has run his knife into his eye!" With an aching heart I hastened down, and saw the humors of the eye trickling down his face; and heard his bitter cry "O Papa, I have hurt my eye! I have hurt my eye 1" I caught him up in my arms, carried him up-stairs, and laid him on the sofa, while I immediately sent for medical aid.
He was cutting a cord tied round a mattress. Fearing to injure it, he cut the cord towards himself: the knife slipped, and went with considerable violence into the ball of the eye, the sight of which he never afterward recovered. Poor boy! At first he was full of distress, not at the pain of the wound, but at the thought of losing his sight; and he asked me with the deepest earnestness, "Papa, shall I be blind? Shall I lose my eye? Shall I lose my eye I" I replied, "My dear child, you know I never deceive you; it is a bad accident, I fear you may lose it." He cried, "O Papa, I cannot bear to lose my eye!" I said, "Do you not believe that God loves you, dear Augustus? Did He spare His own Son for you? Could you not, if it were His WILL, bear to be blind?" "Yes," he replied, while the tears streamed down his cheeks, "if it is God's will that I should be blind, I am willing to be blind." This was indeed a triumph of the grace of God; it filled our hearts with thankfulness in the midst of our deep sorrow; and we knelt together round the dear sufferer, and commended him to the Lord, thanking Him for giving him grace to submit to His holy will, and beseeching Him to sustain him under this deep affliction, and sanctify it to him.
From that time not a murmur escaped his lip. His brother and sisters, and the greater part of the family, departed for W—on the Monday, as had been previously arranged, leaving him in his dark chamber; but he was quiet, and resigned to the will of God. He said to me a few days after, "Papa, I have prayed to God to show me why He sent me this trial, and I see that I needed it. I was becoming very worldly, and God saw that I should have been more so if I went to C—, and therefore He prevented my going there.”
What made this accident the more remarkable was, that a dear friend had only a few weeks before cautioned Augustus, in using his knife, never to cut towards himself, and told him of a similar accident which had happened to a friend of his some time before. Augustus remembered this warning, and had himself given it to two or three men who were packing our furniture, the very day it happened to himself. Another remarkable thing was, that he had lost his knife till within a short time (I think about half-an-hour) before the accident happened, when one of my boys found and brought it to him. How the Lord causes us to see His hand in these apparently little things! And if we believe that not a sparrow falls to the ground without His knowledge, and that the hairs of His children are all numbered, how it silences the murmurs and reasonings of our hearts, and enables us to say, "It is the Lord, let him do what seemeth him good I" And how easy has He made it to say this, if we really believe what He has told us, that His end in all our afflictions is "our profit, that we should be made partakers of His holiness!" HEB. 12. "We know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them that are the called according to His purpose." This only can enable us to say, in the precious words of this dear child, " IF IT IS GOD'S WILL, I AM WILLING! "Precious fruit of His Spirit, who could say, when His soul was exceeding sorrowful, even unto death," Nevertheless, not my will, but thine be done!"—" The cup which my Father hath given me, shall I not drink it?”
The Lord, in this, as in many other ways, was dealing with dear Augustus as a father dealeth with his son,—"For whom the Lord loveth, he chasteneth, and scourgeth every son whom he receiveth." And there was present fruit from this discipline. If the Father purges the branch, it is only that it may bear more fruit, (John 15:22Every branch in me that beareth not fruit he taketh away: and every branch that beareth fruit, he purgeth it, that it may bring forth more fruit. (John 15:2),) fruit in which the Father is glorified, (ver. 8,) and which will remain forever, (ver. 16.) If the words by which Job glorified God in the day of his affliction, "The Lord gave, and the Lord hath taken away, blessed be the name of the Lord," are recorded by the Holy Ghost for our instruction and comfort, surely the words of this dear child, though but a babe in the school' of Christ, were precious to Him, the fruit of whose grace they were, and may instruct others older than himself. "Blessed is the man whom thou chastenest, O Lord, and teachest out of thy law.”
It was not till several weeks after this, that Augustus was able to remove to W—; and there he had frequent relapses of inflammation in his eye, which rendered confinement to a dark chamber, and other measures necessary, which, I believe, greatly weakened a naturally delicate constitution.
We now come to the closing scenes of his earthly pilgrimage. He had been feeling poorly towards the end of 1844, but nothing that at all alarmed us. Thinking that change of air might be beneficial to him, we took him, with his sister Lucy and my two eldest children, on a visit to our beloved friends the O'B—s, at S—. He rode his pony the greater part of the way there, and all the way home, and seemed greatly to enjoy it. On his return home, he had an attack of the chicken-pox with his brother and sister; at the same time Lucy, who had been left behind with Mrs. Deck, had a severe attack of the same complaint at K—, at our brother Mr. J—'s, three of whose family caught the infection. It was of a very violent character, and they suffered severely. Dear Augustus was never well after this. Feeling uneasy about him, we called in medical advice, and the disease, which had been insidiously working in him, then manifested itself; and with its progress there was a daily increasing display of the rich and precious grace of God. At the end of February, for the sake of his beloved parents, I began to keep a journal of everything that was striking in the experience of their dear child, and the Lord's dealings with him, from which I make the following extracts, trusting that the record of what so comforted their hearts may cause many to glorify the Lord for His loving-kindness and mercy to him.