Motherhood: January 2010
Table of Contents
The Mother’s Trust
Beneath the blood-stained lintel I
with my children stand;
A messenger of judgment is passing
through the land;
There is no other refuge from the
destroyer’s face —
Beneath the blood-stained lintel shall
be our hiding place.
The Lamb of God has suffered; our
sins and grief He bore;
By faith the blood is sprinkled above
our dwelling’s door;
The Lord, who judges righteously,
has given that sacred sign:
Tonight the blood-stained lintel shall
shelter me and mine.
My Saviour, for my dear ones I claim
Thy promise true;
The Lamb is “for the household” —
the children’s Saviour too;
On earth the little ones once felt Thy
touch divine;
Beneath the blood-stained lintel Thy
blessing give to mine.
O Thou who gave them, guard
them — those wayward little feet;
The wilderness before them,
the ills of life to meet;
My mother-love is helpless;
I trust them to Thy care!
Beneath the blood-stained lintel —
my place is ever there.
Motherhood
One of the greatest privileges and responsibilities God has given to a human being is the place He has given to the woman as mother. In this place, she is the mother of all living, for through her God’s Saviour came into this world. She, more than any other, is identified with the character of what children become as adults. Paul simply and clearly states God’s will, “I will therefore that the younger women marry, bear children, guide the house, give none occasion to the adversary to speak reproachfully.”
Because of sin, man’s days are filled with the sweat of getting bread from the toil of struggling with a cursed ground. Because of sin, the women’s travail and pain is greatly increased in bearing children. Sadly, man, through the results of his sin, must now leave the home and go out and struggle with the earth to provide food, while his wife bears the great and painful responsibility of bearing the children. Nevertheless, he may assist her in her great work, for “she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety.”
Throughout the Word we are taught, “Honor thy . . . mother.” Our Lord gives us the perfect example of giving such honor. “When Jesus therefore saw His mother, and the disciple standing by, whom He loved, He saith unto His mother, Woman, behold thy son! Then saith He to the disciple, Behold thy mother! And from that hour that disciple took her unto his own home.” “Her children arise up, and call her blessed” (Prov. 31:28). Let us all honor our mothers!
Theme of the Issue
Motherhood
There is nothing sweeter than a young mother holding her newborn baby in her arms. Yet this noble occupation of motherhood is slighted as inferior by many in our society. What has happened to us! Without mothers we would lack the nurturing care of the home and our race would soon become extinct! Adam realized this after the curse of death fell on him when he called his wife’s name Eve, “because she was the mother of all living” (Gen. 3:20). The realization of how life could continue when he was under the sentence of death was a greater blessing to him than his blessing the first time he saw his wife and said, “This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man” (Gen. 2:23). There is something better for young women to look forward to after their wedding day; it is the day they hold a newborn in their arms.
God instituted the natural order of the family. We do well to adhere closely to His model. It will be to our detriment if we depart from it. Our society emphasizes work and pleasure so much that the importance of an orderly home is considered menial and unworthy of those with so-called “better qualities.” The birth rate in many nations is falling. This creates innumerable other detrimental consequences, such as a reduced work force and a high concentration of elderly people. These things are only secondary results on which it is not our purpose to dwell.
In writing on this subject, we could speak as those who find it objectionable that women are taking the place of men. This is certainly wrong, but I would like to address the subject from the point of view that the greater error for women is for them not to fulfill their own role of being nurturing mothers in the home.
The Attack on Women
When Adam and Eve fell into sin and became servants to Satan, God probed the causes of their sin and gave His judgment on each of them. At that time, among other things, He said to the serpent (Satan), “I will put enmity between thee and the woman, and between thy seed and her seed; it shall bruise thy head, and thou shalt bruise his heel.” To the women He said, “I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee” (Gen. 3:15-16). These two statements from the Lord are at the core of the issue of “motherhood.” Enmity was not put into the woman’s heart but into Satan. The promise of a seed that would bruise the head of Satan was given to women. The birth of the Lord Jesus was the fulfillment of that promise. Satan sought to destroy Him right from the time He was born. At the cross when Jesus died, He bruised Satan’s head, overcoming the power of death as a man. He ascended into heaven and Satan can no longer reach Him. But He returned to heaven without having progeny (Isa. 53:8). One of his last acts while on the cross was to provide for the care of His mother.
The hope of women in Old Testament times was to be the mother of the promised seed. The Virgin Mary fulfilled this role. Nevertheless, the enmity of Satan against women continues. The focus of attack now is to hinder women from multiplying a seed for Christ. In this unabated conflict, a door of opportunity is open for mothers. It is specially given to them to multiply a seed for Christ. Though the sorrow and pains of childbirth were not removed at Christ’s coming, the New Testament gives a special promise to mothers. “The woman, having been deceived, was in transgression. But she shall be preserved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and love and holiness with discretion” (1 Tim. 2:14-15 JND). The Lord will preserve the godly woman who submits to her role of bearing children, and the children that are born and brought to the Lord will live on in blessing with Christ long after Satan is bound. The mothers will be the victors in this conflict.
First the Natural;
Then the Spiritual
The Lord Jesus was the firstborn of His mother Mary. He in resurrection became the beginning of a new creation. This answers to what Adam looked for when he named Eve. “The first man Adam was made a living soul; the last Adam was made a quickening spirit. Howbeit that was not first which is spiritual, but that which is natural; and afterward that which is spiritual” (1 Cor. 15:45-46). It is through the preaching of the gospel concerning how Christ died for our sins and was raised again from the dead that we partake of His spiritual life. But it is impossible to have this spiritual life without first having the natural. This is where the door of opportunity is open for mothers: first, to have children, and then to bring the children to the Lord as Saviour. Children that are brought to know the Lord in this way will not only live a few years under the curse of sin and die; they shall be part of the family of God. “Jesus said unto her, I am the resurrection, and the life: he that believeth in Me, though he were dead, yet shall he live: and whosoever liveth and believeth in Me shall never die” (John 11:25-26).
In this regard, we remind those who cannot have children of their own that there is still the opportunity to bring souls to know the Lord. This better part of the two roles is still yours to fulfill. The Lord says in Isaiah 54:1, “Sing, O barren, thou that didst not bear; break forth into singing, and cry aloud, thou that didst not travail with child: for more are the children of the desolate than the children of the married wife, saith the Lord.”
Children
In the New Testament after our Saviour Jesus Christ had annulled death and brought life and immortality to light through the gospel, we have the instructions given to Timothy, “I will therefore that the younger women marry, bear children, guide the house, give none occasion to the adversary to speak reproachfully” (1 Tim. 5:14). Women who faithfully fulfill this role are a great blessing to their families and also to the church. It is used to preserve the local assemblies over the years till the Lord comes. This is not to say that everyone should have a large family. This misses the mark. Parents should have the number of children they can properly bring up for the Lord, and “happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them.” For this reason the husbands are to “dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honor unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered” (1 Peter 3:7). Raising a family for the Lord is the work of two parents. It can only be done through diligence and prayerfully following the instructions in the Word.
Some young couples like to postpone having children to enjoy life without the responsibility of children. While we admit there may be special cases, it is best to have children when you are young. Others may seek to refrain from having children because of all the wickedness in the world. It is true the Lord said concerning Judas that it would have been better if he had never been born. But the Lord is able to keep us from falling (Jude 24). It is not faith to avoid having children because of evil circumstances in the world. May the Lord give us to see His delight in having children (Prov. 8:31), as well as the blessing it brings to our own homes. “Lo, children are an heritage of the Lord: and the fruit of the womb is His reward. As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth. Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them: they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with the enemies in the gate” (Psa. 127:35).
To the Elder Women
The major part of the role of mothers commences after the children are born. The work of mothers is caring for those in the home with the object of nurturing and teaching the children to enter adulthood well equipped for the time when they will follow the Lord on their own. Psalm 131 speaks of a weaned child who not only has a personal relationship with the Lord, measured by self-control, but also has in view the good of the people of God. The elder women are given the role of helping and teaching the younger mothers. Paul wrote to Titus that the elder women were to be “teachers of what is right; that they may admonish the young women to be attached to [their] husbands, to be attached to [their] children, discreet, chaste, diligent in home work, good, subject to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be evil spoken of” (Titus 2:45 JND). We would encourage the elder women to fulfill this much needed role.
D. C. Buchanan
A Word to Mothers
“Wisdom hath builded her house, she hath hewn out her seven pillars.” “Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands” (Prov. 9:1; 14:1).
I know that you, Christian mother, are deeply concerned over those dear children God has given to you. You are interested in God’s pattern for home life, for the home is your particular sphere. You are the guide in it (1 Tim. 5:14). If it were a new house being built for the family, how carefully you and your husband would study the plans together, thinking of how you would enjoy it with your children. And how much more important is the plan God has given us, not for a beautiful house of wood, brick or stone, which may be spoiled by the broken hearts behind its grand walls, but for a home of light and love. In a word, it is the character of the home that makes it what it really is, be it humble or grand in appearance.
Building or Plucking Down
We have noticed the seven pillars of the home which wisdom has hewn out for us, and we read in the verses that follow of the wonderful feast held there. This we all desire. Every Christian father and mother wants a happy home with its joy and peace — but oh it takes so little to pluck it down!
And you, dear Christian mother, can be your husband’s true helpmeet in building this home of light and love, or you can pluck it down. You can encourage and uphold him in his love and correction of the children, or you can oppose and hinder him. This is very important. You wield a tremendous influence in the home, in many ways far greater than your husband’s. You are with the children more than he is, and they look to you. You can do more than he to make or break the home. Remember how Eve ruined the first home in the world when she acted independently of God and her husband. She did not turn to him, but took the lead herself and listened to the voice of Satan instead. God had made her to be a helpmeet to Adam, but she hindered him, bringing plenty of sorrow upon herself too. God’s pattern is always the best, and we can only expect His blessing as we seek grace to follow His Word.
Two External Things
There are also two external things which God has given to mark out the woman’s place: her long hair and her apparel. I believe we should mention these here, for they are important enough for God to mention them in His Word in a very definite way. Long hair is a sign of submission (1 Cor. 11:3-15) and is in keeping with a godly home. Then, too, there is modest apparel, clothes pertaining to a man being mentioned, for such would be unbecoming to a woman who is in her God-given place (1 Tim. 2:9; Deut. 22:5). In these days when the fashions are altogether otherwise, there needs to be a single eye to please the Lord, and not others, in these matters, especially before our children.
Worldly Advice
Dear Christian mother, “Cease . . . to hear the instruction that causeth to err from the words of knowledge” (Prov. 19:27). Do not listen to the advice of the world, nor even to that of some Christians who reject “the counsel of God against themselves” (Luke 7:30) because it condemns them. It is your wisdom to seek grace to fulfill the place of a helpmeet (not of the head) which God has given you in the home. It is a wonderful place. Even if your husband should fail in fulfilling his place as head, ask the Lord for grace to fulfill yours. His failure does not change your place or responsibility, nor does it change his. He needs your help and prayers. Alas, we all fail as husbands, but fault finding and blaming one another will not straighten matters out, nor help to build up the home, but it will surely help to “pluck it down.” How much we need the grace and strength which comes from above, especially when difficulties arise in the home, but let us not depart from the divine pattern.
There may be some who read these lines who have unbelieving husbands and I know that the Lord will give you grace in these things, if you look to Him, that, as Peter says, “If any obey not the Word, they may also, without the Word be won by the conversation of the wives” (1 Peter 3:1).
The Divine Pattern
How thankful we can be for all this precious instruction in the Word of God, and that God has not left us to our own thoughts in these matters. He has marked out the pattern, not to rob us of happiness, but for our good as fathers and mothers — that our joy may be full. Let us each take the Scriptures and search this out. See what God’s Word says and ask Him for grace to carry it out.
I speak these words humbly, I trust, and in love, knowing that God has planned that our days in the home should be “as the days of heaven upon the earth” (Deut. 11:21). If we follow His wisdom, they will be! Ponder these things well, dear Christian mother, and may God bless you and your dear children. By acting upon God’s Word, you can prove the blessedness of walking in His ways, and your husband and children will say of you what is said of the wife and mother described in Proverbs 31:2829, “Her children arise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her. Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.”
May this be said of you, not only while the children are small, but above all as they grow older, for the more they love the Lord, the more they will love you! Your work will then be rewarded even here, and the latter years of life will be happy ones for you and your husband, should the Lord leave us here a little longer. There is no greater joy than when our children walk in the truth, and sometimes I think there is no greater sorrow than when they do not!
“Be ye strong therefore, and let not your hands be weak: for your work shall be rewarded” (2 Chron. 15:7).
G. H. Hayhoe
A Heritage From the Lord
God has brought us into a place of relationship where we have the life and nature capable of enjoying Him. He acts as a father toward us and corrects and disciplines us as His children to the end that we might be partakers of His holiness (Heb. 12:711; 1 Peter 1:17). He also feels for us as a father: “Like as a father pitieth his children, so the Lord pitieth them that fear Him” (Psa. 103:13). And He comforts as a mother would: “As one whom his mother comforteth, so will I comfort you” (Isa. 66:13).
Bonding
It is in this human relationship we learn in a feeble measure something of our Father’s love to us and of the satisfaction that we derive from our children’s responsive love. What a moment it is when the young father and mother see, for the first time, their own precious child! What a thrilling experience it is when they, for the first time, hold in their arms that little bundle of life — their own flesh and blood! Surges of affection, hitherto unrealized, rise in their hearts. Well did the psalmist say, “Lo, children are a heritage of the Lord: and the fruit of the womb is His reward” (Psa. 127:3).
The young father and mother now have a common object for their affections. There is nothing like the birth of their firstborn to bind their hearts together. Certainly they will love each and all of their later children with the same father- and mother-love, but the advent of the firstborn is what brings them into that relationship and opens up the hitherto dormant fountains of parental affection and gives a sense of parental responsibility. When the mother holds in her arms that darling infant, her own flesh and blood, for the first time, she learns what the affections of a mother are; the father likewise enters into the feelings of a father when he fondly holds his own son or daughter. These blessed affections are of God; it was He who put them in the human breast. To be devoid of them would be a sad lack indeed and would show how much we had imbibed of the spirit of “the last days” when men are “without natural affection.”
Avoiding Parenthood
It is reprehensible when a Christian husband and wife seek to escape or to avoid the responsibilities of parenthood. It would be better to remain unmarried than to seek to thwart a chief purpose of marriage. Such ways may be countenanced in the world, but the child of God is not to look to the world for wisdom or guidance.
God, in His wisdom, may not give children to some couples, but this must be taken as one of His dispensations of love and wisdom, and not be treated with rebellion. There may also be physical troubles that arise that would limit the size of the family, but this is not within our province to discuss. The Word of God says the women that marry are to “bear children, guide the house” (1 Tim. 5:14).
Struggles
We have known some parents who had long and hard struggles financially while bringing up a family, but God was sufficient for it all, and finally the day came when the straitened circumstances were relieved. Then they had the joy and comfort of children who had come to years. How much many a parent would have lacked in their old age in the way of comfort as well as provision if it had not been for the children God gave them in their youth.
We would especially emphasize the privilege and blessing of being parents. It has its problems, difficulties and trials, but who can have the heart of a parent who is not one? Many and varied are the lessons which our Father teaches us in the bringing up of children. It is often one of the most instructive courses in the wilderness schooling of the child of God.
P. Wilson
“for This Child I Prayed”
Many mothers have prayed for a child with similar words, but far fewer have given their children back to the Lord with these words. The reality and purpose of heart of this dear woman Hannah is admirable. She understood and wanted to fulfill her role as a mother, but the Lord had shut up her womb. The difficulties and exercises that Hannah went through to obtain a child may well encourage every mother. She dealt with rivalry from her peer Peninnah and the fretting that this produced in her own soul, and, although her husband loved her, he did not understand her need; then Eli the priest was hard on her. None of these adversities kept her from persisting. She went to the Lord in prayer. Her petition was granted when she relinquished having a child to satisfy her own desires and promised to lend the child to the Lord. We see later how the Lord needed that child to witness to and replace the failing priests of Eli’s family.
The Husband, Peer and Priest
The family of Elkanah was a godly family that went up to Shiloh each year. But Hannah’s desire for a child was so intense she could not be happy. This desire to have children was right. To whom could she go with this problem? Elkanah, her husband, had children by his other wife. We are not told how he came to have two wives, but his comment of being better to her than ten sons was very self-centered. Nor was he acting as “heirs together of the grace of life” with Hannah. Yes, he did love her and gave a worthy portion to her, but he could not understand or help her with her sorrow of soul.
To make matters worse, Peninnah, the other wife who had children, provoked her and made life miserable. This provoking made going up to the house of the Lord a difficult thing for Hannah, for she had no children to thank the Lord for as Peninnah did. The best that Hannah could do in this situation was pray to the Lord alone.
It is sad to see Eli the priest sitting on a chair by the temple. He should have been standing and ministering to the needs of the people instead of overindulging himself. He did not have good discernment concerning Hannah, and his family was a dishonor to the Lord. All Israel could see these faults, but none of these circumstances hindered Hannah from going to the Lord’s house to pray. The Lord was still there, and He could answer prayer. When Eli found that she was a godly soul praying to the Lord, he promised her that the Lord would give her the petition she had requested. She believed the word and was no longer sad. Her humble response is beautiful: “Let thine handmaid find grace in thy sight.” She treated the answer as an act of the grace of God. “It is a good thing that the heart be established with grace.” This is a sure ground of blessing. We often treat the answers to our prayers as something deserved.
Consecration
The name Hannah means “grace.” She lived up to her name. When the Lord gave her a son, she did not claim the son as her own, but consecrated him to the Lord. This was not any kind of bargain with the Lord because of what He would do or had done, but a voluntary act of lending him to the Lord for His service. Those of us who are parents may well consider this example regarding our children. Do we raise them according to our own desires? or for the Lord?
After Samuel was weaned, the day came to present him to the Lord. We read, “She took him up with her, with three bullocks, and one ephah of flour, and a bottle of wine, and brought him unto the house of the Lord in Shiloh: and the child was young. And they slew a bullock, and brought the child to Eli” (vss. 24-25). These sacrifices which accompanied the presentation of the child to the priest have a lesson for us. They show that the propitiation Christ made for God is the means by which the child could acceptably be presented to God. The sacrifices presented with the boy made the child worthy to be presented to the Lord. This is the only right basis upon which parents can dedicate their children to God. We may think that the act of consecrating our children to the Lord is worthy enough in itself that they be accepted. And the more a godly parent invests in training and guiding his children without a conscious realization of Christ’s work for and in those children, the more the parent will be snared by considering their children as acceptable to God apart from His grace. We need to see that all is of grace. The sacrifices that Elkanah and Hannah offered while dedicating the child to the Lord prove that the parents laid hold of the principle of grace.
Let me repeat these things from another viewpoint. When we, with sadness, as parents, see that our children do not go on for the Lord, let us not blame the Lord for this. In essence, this would be treating all that we have done as something that should have been acceptable to God. It is to fall from grace as the ground of all blessing. Yes, we are responsible to do all we can to bring up our children for the Lord, but even the best we may do in consecrating our children to the Lord is not sufficient to make them acceptable to God. Realizing these things will keep each of us humble and, at the same time, make us diligent as to our families.
Humility
There is a difference between humility and self-condemnation. When we fail with our children, we ought to examine our ways and own our failures before the Lord. But repentance is more than owning that we have failed in certain areas, it is recognizing that everything about us in the flesh is bad. Condemning ourselves for what we have done is to remain focused on the wrong object. Do we believe that, given a second chance, we will do better? Let us rather fall back on the grace of God to do what we cannot do, and in humility accept the consequences of our failures, counting on God to bring blessing.
There is also God’s sovereign side of the matter to consider. He has a sovereign plan of blessing for all those He has called, and nothing will hinder His blessing. He is able even to bring good out of evil. King David spoke of this when he realized he had not kept his house in a just and orderly way. He said, “Although my house be not so with God; yet He hath made with me an everlasting covenant, ordered in all things, and sure: for this is all my salvation, and all my desire, although He make it not to grow” (2 Sam. 23:5). David recognized his failure, but, like Hannah, he held, in faith, to the promises of God to bless his house; at the same time, he was submissive to wait until it was God’s time to make it grow. May the Lord give us this patience of faith in Him.
Worship and Praise
Hannah proceeded to say, “Oh my lord, as thy soul liveth, my lord, I am the woman that stood by thee here, praying unto the Lord. For this child I prayed; and the Lord hath given me my petition which I asked of Him: Therefore also I have lent him to the Lord; as long as he liveth he shall be lent to the Lord. And he worshipped the Lord there” (1 Sam. 1:26-28). The true mother’s heart is satisfied when worship to the Lord is presented by her son, and she is kept in the background. Her son’s worship and service to the Lord is the product of her toiling years of nurturing care with the child for the sake of the Lord.
It is beautiful to see that, after Hannah gave up her son to serve the Lord, she did not return to her former sadness. When she lent her son to the Lord, He filled her heart with communion with Himself. She still had everything for which she had labored. Her heart was not centered only on the son, but on the Lord with her child. Her heart was filled with praise to the Lord and she proclaimed it. Her prayer that follows is really a song of praise. So it is when mothers rise to the height of presenting their children to the Lord as spiritual children for Him, as in this instructive example of Hannah.
D. C. Buchanan
Mothers in Israel
The expression “mother in Israel” occurs twice in the Word of God. I believe that we see some very instructive truths connected with this expression and with the incidents surrounding its use.
Deborah, the Prophetess
“Then sang Deborah and Barak. . . . The inhabitants of the villages ceased, they ceased in Israel, until that I Deborah arose, that I arose a mother in Israel” (Judg. 5:1,7).
In the Book of Judges we see the people of God both giving up and giving in. It stands in contrast to the Book of Joshua, where we see Israel overcoming their enemies and possessing their inheritance. With the failure of the people of God as a backdrop, Deborah (she is mentioned first) and Barak’s song is a beam of sunlight in a dark day, for it is a song of victory. While it is a lengthy duet full of instruction, my intent is to notice only a few thoughts in the song, as it relates to Deborah’s identifying herself as “a mother in Israel.”
In Proverbs we read, “Let a bear robbed of her whelps meet a man, rather than a fool in his folly” (Prov. 17:12). Why a she-bear? They are jealous for their young and are a vivid example of protective care. We see this character exemplified in Deborah. Three negative things marked Deborah’s day. The highways and villages were unoccupied (vss. 67), that is, there was limited fellowship among the people of God. There was war in the gates (vs. 8) — typically, conflict in administrative matters. Also, there was no shield or spear in Israel (vs. 8) —no ability to withstand or defeat the external enemy.
And why were these things so? The beginning of verse 8 seems to suggest it was because “they chose new gods.” Every generation has its gods. We could name a few unique to our day — new “gods” that have been chosen in the last twenty years or so. Sometimes we may wonder why we cannot come to a collective agreement in matters. Is it not because, in many cases, our hearts have not been true to the Lord? The moral consequence is strife in the assembly.
In this pathetic condition of things, Deborah comes forward to encourage a man who would not move without her fellowship. In her we see a woman who dwelt under a palm tree (Judg. 4:5) — the place of sweetness, as in clusters of dates, and marked by flourishing in growth (Psa. 92:12). Deborah stirred “a brother” to exercise his place while keeping in her place (as did Priscilla — Acts 18:26), and she was one who rejoiced in the blessing of the people of God.
We might wonder why it is Barak who is mentioned in Hebrews 11, when it was really Deborah that demonstrated greater faith, but as another has remarked, “As a true mother in Israel, she would want it that way.”
The Wise Woman of Abel
of Beth-Maachah
“I am one of them that are peaceable and faithful in Israel; thou seekest to destroy a city and a mother in Israel: why wilt thou swallow up the inheritance of the Lord?” (2 Sam. 20:19).
Joab set out to destroy Abel of Beth-maachah because they were harboring Sheba, a rebel in David’s kingdom. Evidently this city was once known for wise counsel (vs. 18), but now there was a wicked person who had taken refuge within its walls. While we can understand the vigor of Joab’s assault, especially in view of Absalom’s recent rebellion, we know from other scriptures that Joab was a man who was self-centered; his service to the king was largely for his own benefit. He knew he could not be first in the kingdom, as that place was reserved for the king, but he wanted to be sure of being second to David. He dealt brutally with any rival to this place — be it potential, direct replacements such as Abner or Amasa, or an indirect threat such as Absalom, who, if his overthrow of David were successful, would likely have installed someone else in Joab’s position. Ultimately this tactic caught up with Joab when he believed Adonijah should have the kingdom instead of Solomon, at the time of David’s death. Consequently, he aligned himself with the wrong man.
We see in Joab an outward form of righteousness in dealing with evil, but without regard to the heart of David (compare 2 Sam. 18:5,14), or the importance of this particular city in Israel. Typically, the local assembly gathered to the name of the Lord Jesus is such a city. There is wisdom there; it is indeed “a mother in Israel”—a place where the saints may be preserved. Joab was willing to destroy this city to accomplish his personal objectives under the guise of “dealing with evil.” It was a wise woman in that city (who knew its history and character) who saved it, just as a poor wise man once saved a city although he was subsequently forgotten (Eccl. 9:14-16). This wise woman knew what that city meant and did not despise it, although it perhaps did not have the outward beauty it once did. She was a peaceable woman, but faithful (vs. 19). In the same way, “the wisdom that is from above” is peaceable, but “first pure” (James 3:17).
In recognizing the city as “a mother in Israel,” this wise woman gave testimony that she was of that same moral quality. She was peaceable in that she preserved the city from destruction, but she was faithful in that, through her wisdom, the people dealt with Sheba and cast his head out of the city — a complete rejection of his independency and rebellion.
We are to “follow righteousness, faith, charity, peace, with them that call on the Lord out of a pure heart” (2 Tim. 2:22). That is, God looks for a collective testimony marked by seeking the glory of Christ — no other agendas. Righteousness is the first priority; the desire for peace should indeed be present, but recognizing that it is the result of righteousness, not an objective to be pursued at the expense of righteousness.
It is moving to hear of instances where assemblies were preserved, not because of the faithfulness of the brothers (sometimes there were none who were faithful), but because of the quiet, godly walk of sisters.
As a final remark, let us note that Deborah means “bee” and that the wise woman of Abel spoke of “the inheritance of the Lord.” That inheritance is a land flowing with “milk and honey” (Ex. 3:8). Such a picture speaks of the fellowship of the saints and the sweetness of nature. Let us not despise these necessary provisions.
We trust that each of us will be encouraged in those things that answer to the moral character of these two “mothers in Israel,” as well as learning from their splendid example of faithfulness and love toward God and His people.
W. Brockmeier
A Virtuous Woman
In the latter part of Proverbs 31, the Spirit of God describes for us the virtuous woman, whose price is “far above rubies” (vs. 10). Throughout the history of the human race, men have characteristically been impressed with physical beauty in women, but the emphasis here is on her character, and especially her fear of the Lord. When we consider the departure from God’s order in today’s world concerning the relative place of men and women, there are a number of points to be noticed in this description.
Her God-Given Talents
First of all, this woman was both clever and active. Doubtless she acknowledged her husband’s headship and submitted to him, but this did not keep her from using her God-given talents to the full. She exemplified the truth of 1 Timothy 5:14 (JND): “I will therefore that the younger [women] marry, bear children, rule the house, give no occasion to the adversary in respect of reproach.” In the administration of a busy household, she found ample scope for the use of her mind. She was involved in directing the working of the household, in selling articles made in her house, and even in the buying of property. She directed the affairs of the household so well that her husband did not need to concern himself about them, for he could trust in her.
Her Home
Second, all her activities were centered in the home. While she was most diligent, even to the point of buying and selling, she did not go out and seek to work in the public eye. Her husband takes on that role, for he was “known in the gates” and sat “among the elders of the land” (Prov. 31:23). While she used her abilities well, she used them in the sphere that was given to her of God.
Her Work
Third, she was not afraid to get into the work herself. It is true that she directed and arranged for the work of others, but it is recorded that she worked “willingly with her hands” (Prov. 31:13), that she rose also “while it is yet night” (vs. 15), that she “girdeth her loins with strength,” and that “her candle goeth not out by night” (vs. 18). She not only directed her household, but led by example.
Her Children
Finally, she brought up her children in a way that caused them to “arise up, and call her blessed” (vs. 28). She was characterized by “strength and honor” (vs. 25), yet “she openeth her mouth with wisdom,” and “in her tongue is the law of kindness” (vs. 26).
I believe we see in this account God’s wisdom brought before us. Today the care of a household and the bringing up of children is sometimes despised, as if it were work better left to those who could not “make it” in the outside world. Here we see how God has fitted the woman to “rule” the house and to use her gifts in directing the home in the right way. The combination of the virtues of strength, honor, wisdoms and kindness uniquely fitted this woman for her role, and I believe God is showing us that these things can characterize any woman of God. For this reason it is hard to overemphasize the importance of a wife and mother in the home, and particularly in her character as a mother. When children are young and impressionable, it is their mother who is best fitted to mold their character and shape their will on a day-to-day basis. Doubtless the father too must share in this responsibility, but because he is absent from the home part of the time on account of his work, the children will be left more in the mother’s care. Her careful attention to “the nurture and admonition of the Lord” during their formative years is a most important responsibility, and one neglected only to the detriment of children.
Some Exceptions
In saying this, we recognize that circumstances in the modern world sometimes make this more difficult. When families live in areas where the cost of living is high, sometimes the wife feels that she too must get a job outside the home in order to make ends meet. Other adverse circumstances, such as the inability of the husband and father to go out to work, or even his not being present at all, can make it even more difficult for a mother to fulfill her role as Scripture intended. As has often been remarked, Scripture is not written as a legal book, to cover every possible detail in life, but rather it is a book of principles that must be applied in various circumstances in communion with the Lord and with the guidance of His Spirit. If our hearts are right before Him and there is a sincere wish to walk in the light of His Word, I believe we will find that He is able to make a way for us.
The wisdom of this world, especially in western countries, is more and more against this role for women, and man fails to see that the rising tide of evil, the increasing delinquency of children, and the disobedience and disorder in public schools can at least in part be traced back to the lack of a mother’s presence in the home. It is easy for Christian women to fall into this kind of thinking, as they are bombarded with it from every side. But we must remember, as a servant of the Lord used to remind us, that we are never wiser than Scripture. The wisdom of God as revealed in His Word not only honors God, but ultimately brings happiness to man too.
W. J. Prost
Suffer the Little Children
I cannot pass by the mothers who brought their “little children” to our Lord that He might put His hands on them and pray. We find the story told three times — Matthew 19:13-15, Mark 10:13-16 and Luke 18:15-17. Luke, the physician, tells us that they were “infants.” Mark, who so often records minute details of our Lord’s look or tone or act, tells us that “He took them up in His arms, put His hands upon them, and blessed them” (Mark 10:16). Here the Spirit of God uses a very strong word for bless, reserved for these little children alone, and used in no other place in the New Testament. It might be translated, He “fervently blessed them.” And when the disciples rebuked these mothers, Mark tells us also that the Lord was “much displeased.” Again the Spirit uses a very strong word that has the meaning of being “grieved, indignant, angry.” You will remember how He said, “Suffer the little children to come to Me; forbid them not” (JND). We read in the New Testament six times of others being much displeased or grieved or indignant or angry — the disciples themselves on more than one occasion, the Pharisees, and the ruler of the synagogue, but only once do we ever find this word used of our Lord, and that was towards His own disciples when they tried to hinder the mothers bringing their little ones to Him. There is a very grave lesson for us in this word. Sad to say, there are many today who walk in the disciples’ footsteps and seek to hinder Christian parents bringing their little children to the Lord. These persons think that they are doing God service, but I fear that the Lord is grieved, indignant and angry. “Beloved, follow not that which is evil, but that which is good” (3 John 11).
G. C. Willis
The Widow of Nain
The Spirit presents, in a few words, the deep loneliness of the condition of the widow of Nain. The dead man was “the only son of his mother, and she was a widow.” The heart of Jesus was arrested, and then He arrested the bier of the dead young man. His compassions always went before His mercies. It is commonly said that the heart moves the hand. Do you not prize a blessing that comes to you in that way? Salvation came gushing forth from the heart of Christ. To say that the cross of Christ is the source of our blessedness would be slandering the heart of God. God loved the world and sent His Son; Christ’s heart went before His hand. A blessing from Christ is given, as Jeremiah says, with His whole heart and His whole soul. “He came and touched the bier.” He was undefilable, or He must have gone to the priest to cleanse Himself after touching it. Did Christ ever need the washings of the sanctuary? He might have restored the young man without touching him, but He has God’s relationship to iniquity. He not only stood apart from the actuality of sin, but from the possibility of it. “He delivered him to his mother.” Let me be bold and say, The Lord does not save you that you may serve Him. To suggest the thought would be to qualify the beauty of grace. He did not say, I give you life that you may spend it for Me. Let His love constrain you to spend and be spent for Him, but He never stands before your heart and says, Now I will forgive you if you will serve Me. Surely, He had purchased him, yet He gave him back to his mother. Yet you and I go back to the world and seek to make ourselves happy and important in it. Ah, throw the cords of love around your heart, and keep it fast by Jesus! Amen.
J. G. Bellett