1 Corinthians 14:33
There are three great divine principles that should characterize the Christian home, namely: order, obedience and love. Not only must these all be present in a Christian home, but they must be in proper balance with one another. God wants these things to be an integral part of our homes so that they will be beacons of light in this poor world. Yet how often our homes fail to reflect that heavenly light that has shined into our hearts (2 Cor. 4:6) because we have neglected the Word of God and communion with our Lord!
Order, obedience and love are inseparable, for without obedience and submission, there can be no order. Where there is no love, there will be no true and lasting obedience in unity, and where there is no unity, there again can be no order.
Order
God is a God of order. He “is not the author of confusion” (1 Cor. 14:33). Disorder and confusion belong to the kingdom of Satan and darkness, but He that is clothed with honor and majesty, who covers Himself “with light as with a garment,” cannot permit disorder in His kingdom. This state would be utterly inconsistent with light and derogatory to majesty. As to His divine wisdom, it expresses itself in that perfect order which characterizes all His counsels and works. It is this principle of divine order that pervades the universe. When we consider the heavens and the firmament, we find that their language testifies not only to the glory of God, but also to the fact that God is a God of order. We see the same thing in the lower creation around us — all is in the same perfect order.
Likewise, this same spirit of order and harmony breathes from every page of the Holy Scriptures, and this is done so that our daily life may have that same spirit of order and harmony. Surely the Lord Jesus, in His life on earth, was always the pattern and expression of it!
Now, in this dispensation of grace, the believer in the Lord Jesus is “blessed . . . with all spiritual blessings in heavenly places in Christ” (Eph. 1:3) and has infinitely higher privileges than Israel did in the Old Testament. In view of all this, has God’s principle of order been set aside or relaxed? On the contrary, the richness of our blessings and the nearness of our heavenly relationship are the very reasons why order is the more insisted upon, whether in the house of God or in our own houses.
By the word “order” we understand such a condition of things and persons that everything and everyone is found and moves or acts in the proper, appointed place, sphere and time. In this way, order is one of the essential requirements for human happiness, prosperity and success.
The spirit of the world today is one of revolution and change, and as a result, disorder tends to characterize the world around us. Sad to say, this spirit of disorder is appearing not only in the world, but also among Christians everywhere. No doubt the ultimate cause of this is the spirit of disobedience, pride and independence. This leads us to a consideration of the second divine principle we have mentioned—obedience.
Obedience
The first sin that entered this world was disobedience. It has made the world what it is today — a place of violence and corruption, sorrow, death and, ultimately, judgment. Prior to man’s sin in the Garden of Eden, it was pride and disobedience that led Satan to his fall. That sin of disobedience has turned him into an arch deceiver and the father of lies.
On the other hand, those angels who did not fall are spoken of in Psalm 103:20 as those who “excel in strength, that do His commandments.” Their strength is combined with obedience, in contrast to fallen angels, whose strength is combined with disobedience.
Although disobedience was the first sin, it resulted in a second terrible sin which grew from the first. It was the sin of self-sufficiency and independence which was shown out in Cain and ultimately became characteristic of the world system that he began. Combined with this sin is envy and hatred against everything that is good and right, and we know that this resulted in Cain’s murder of his brother Abel for no other reason than that God had respect to Abel’s offering. Thus we see that disobedience is most serious and has far-reaching consequences.
In contrast, what were the motives in the heart of the Lord Jesus, when He came into this world? He came in perfect submission, perfect obedience, and as the perfect, dependent Man. Through His work on Calvary’s cross He has redeemed us from “this present evil world” and brought us into the family of God. God expects that His family will be characterized by that obedience and dependence that was exhibited so fully by His beloved Son. The Christian home should thus be characterized by obedience and submission rather than by the self-will and disobedience that is the character of Cain’s world. Surely, there is nothing so difficult for the heart of the natural man as obedience and submission to another. His heart rebels against this more than anything else. But God does not simply exhort us to obedience; rather, He brings in another divine principle, that of love.
Love
In speaking of every principle of divine truth, we must keep the spirit of self-judgment before us, considering our individual failure in it all. Surely this is true of order and obedience, but perhaps even more so when we consider love. It was God’s intention that the testimony of believers to this world would be that “ye have love one to another” (John 13:35). We would all agree that we have failed in this, and perhaps we have also failed in the exhibition of love in our home life.
We know that “God is light” and that “God is love.” It is important to recognize that light and love are closely connected and are inseparable. John writes, “He that loveth his brother abideth in the light, and there is none occasion of stumbling in him” (1 John 2:10). Our God has not only shined in our hearts to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ, but He has also shed abroad in our hearts His love, by the Holy Spirit given to us. The Lord Jesus, when He was on earth, was always the exhibition of God’s light and love, and it is only in walking with Him that we will be able, in some measure, to do the same.
In fixing our eyes on the glory of Christ, we will be able to treat self (which is the opposite and opposer of love) as a judged and condemned thing. Love is the very opposite of self. It forgets self to think only of its object. Just as light cannot be hidden, so love also cannot be hidden. It wants and looks for an object, in order to make the object as happy as itself. It cannot be shut up to itself, but goes out to its object, to spend itself upon it. Thus we see, for example, in Ephesians 5, the character of divine light and love brought out, and its manifestation in the walk of those who belong to the family of God.
In the Christian home love will be the bond that brings order and obedience together in the right way. Where love is shown, obedience will be the happy response to that love, and if correction is needed, the object of that correction will see clearly that love is the motive behind it. Where love is the character of the home, order will still be insisted upon, but all in the household will realize that order is maintained because of that love and is for the ultimate good of all.
All Kept in Balance
The Christian home must be characterized by a meshing of order, obedience and love. These things must be kept in balance, and only in walking with the Lord, following His Word, and by the guidance of the Holy Spirit can this be done. An overemphasis on order and obedience, but without love, will produce rebellion. An emphasis on love to the exclusion of obedience and order is not true love, but rather a love of self that refuses to take the time and effort needed to insist on proper behavior. Such an attitude will produce chaos and ultimately a despising of the authority that refuses to set guidelines and see that they are followed.
No doubt all who read this will be aware of their own shortcomings, and surely we would all take our place in admitting our failure. However, let us not be discouraged, but rather ask the Lord for grace to model our homes according to the pattern of Scripture and according to that perfect One who is always our example!
J. A. von Poseck (adapted from Light in Our Dwellings)