Manhood and Responsibility
We have previously noticed that God gave Adam specific responsibilities (Gen. 2:15-17). He was to represent God as head over creation (image), morally carrying out his responsibilities in a manner glorifying to God (likeness). But Adam failed—failed to guard Eden against the entrance of the serpent, failed to guard his wife from the serpent’s guile, failed in obedience to God’s command bringing the consequences of untold sorrow, sin and death into the world (Gen. 3:16).
Responsibility’s Resource
Brothers must not fail to accept their God-given place as responsible heads if marriages, families and the assembly are to be blessed and bear fruit. We have the indwelling Spirit of God supplying the love (Rom. 5:5), wisdom (Eph. 1:17) and power (Eph. 3:16 JND) needed to act as men of God in this scene.
Do you feel the need of more wisdom? “If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally... and it shall be given” (James 1:5).
In James 4:6 we learn that God gives “more grace” to the humble. Every divine provision and grace that a Christian man needs to take his place of responsibility to God is available in infinite supply.
Irresponsibility’s Results
While not seeking to dwell on failure, we know that “many things as have been written before have been written for our instruction” (Rom. 15:4 JND). So we find in the lives of the patriarchs those times when even they failed to act as men responsible to God. May we learn from their record.
Responsibility for Self-Control
After the flood, man (in Noah) was made responsible to govern the purged world for God’s glory. Governing requires self-control. We read in Genesis 9:20 that “Noah began to be an husbandman, and he planted a vineyard.”
In Genesis 4:2, we find the first man born in this world (Cain) also labored as “a husbandman” (Gen. 4:2 JND). The occupation that engaged both Cain and Noah may have been right in itself, but both failed to exercise self-control in responsibility to God as they pursued their chosen labor.
Cain was overcome first by pride, then anger, and finally violence horrible results of the sin of self-will and the lack of self-control!
Noah, responsible to govern in the new world, was overcome by intemperance. Though God has not told us why Noah chose to be a husbandman, we do learn the sad results of his lack of self-control. He “drank... wine, and was drunken; and he was uncovered within his tent” (Gen. 9:21).
What devastation results in marriages and families, as well as in the realms of employment and recreation, when husbands and fathers do not exercise manly self-control. Equally disastrous are the results of men—brethren in the assembly who do not conduct themselves among their brethren with self-control.
Peter exhorts us to be diligent in adding to our “faith virtue; and to virtue knowledge” (2 Peter 1:5). Another has said that virtue is moral courage. Both are closely connected, and for manhood, both moral courage and self-control are vital. It is interesting to note that the root of the Greek word “virtue” (“arte”) comes from a word signifying “male.” Brothers desiring to act as men must constantly seek grace to exercise self-control in every area of their life.
“He that hath no rule over his own spirit is like a city that is broken down, and without walls” (Prov. 25:28).
“I keep under my body, and bring it into subjection” (1 Cor. 9:27).
Responsibility in Marriage
Even in the life of a man of faith such as Abraham, we see a time when his faith faltered. The result was that rather than taking responsibility as head of his marriage in seeing to Sarah’s protection, Abraham encouraged her to deny their union in order that he might live (Gen. 12:12-13).
What an infinite contrast with our Lord Jesus Christ! He died bearing the full weight and responsibility for the sin of that which He loved. “Christ... loved the church, and gave Himself for it” (Eph. 5:25).
Abraham’s actions put Sarah at the mercy of the world. How often do men allow their wives to be adversely affected by the world because they will not bear responsibility of being saviour of the body.
Husbands! Being the saviour of your body—your wife (“bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh”)—will require your daily, prayerful exercise and care!
Responsibility for Fidelity
Husbands are responsible to hold marriage pure. One of the great attacks men experience today is from the strange woman, and this frequently happens in the workplace. Men must exercise moral self-control so they not be snared by the lips (Prov. 5:3), the embrace (Prov. 5:20), the flattery (Prov. 6:24) or the eyes (Prov. 6:25) of the strange woman.
“Rejoice with the wife of thy youth” (Prov. 5:18).
Responsibility to Defend
Unlike Abraham, Jacob is often seen as an example of failure rather than faith. But there is a special moment in his life when his actions shine as one of the supreme examples of bearing responsibility in defending his family.
Coming back after twenty-one years of hard toil with Laban’s flocks, word comes to Jacob that his brother Esau, who earlier had planned to kill him, was coming with four hundred men to meet him (Gen. 32:6). We can surely understand the dear patriarch’s fear.
Reverting to his normal character, Jacob schemes to deal with a supposedly angry Esau, hoping at best to spare some of his family. First, flocks are sent as gifts, then his wives, concubines and children are divided into groups, his most loved Rachel and Joseph in the very back hoping that if slaughter came, at least they might escape (Gen. 33:12).
But then Jacob acts in the finest and highest dignity of manhood. There’s no Abrahamor Isaac-like denial of his wife now. We read in Genesis 33:3 the majestic account of one who is bearing, as a man, full responsibility for the defense and safety of his family. “He passed over before them.” What dignity! What courage! What love! Jacob went to meet Esau in front of his family. He says, as it were, “If the sword of Esau my brother is to fall, it will have to fall on me first.” Here is a man acting in full responsibility, standing in the forefront to defend his family.
May God grant Christian men to take the lead, guarding their wives and children against the attacks—spiritual and moral—of this evil world.
“So ought men also to love their own wives as their own bodies.... No one has ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, even as also the Christ the assembly” (Eph. 5:28-29 JND).
“If anyone does not provide for his own, and specially for those of his house, he has denied the faith” (1 Tim. 5:8 JND).
Responsibility to Nurture Confidence
In this frenzied age, dads are under great pressure from the world. Often at the most inconvenient time a child comes with some insignificant problem. But, dads, don’t ever act annoyed at these interruptions! Exercise self-control and patience! Never let your first words be, “I’m busy now,” or, “Go ask Mom.” Such responses will quickly destroy the confidence and security your child has in you.
Mom may indeed be better equipped to handle the problem, and it’s not wrong to send the child to her. But first spend time showing interest in whatever concerns your child. If you fail to do this, your children will very soon learn not to bother you at all, and a critical bridge of confidence and trust will have been broken down one that you may never again be able to rebuild. Dads, be especially mindful of this with your beloved daughters! Spend time with them individually and frequently.
Jacob’s daughter Dinah “went out to see the daughters of the land” (Gen. 34:1). The result was that she was defiled and lost her purity. Did she yearn for the world’s companionship because she, perhaps, felt her father didn’t have time for her?
Dads! Spend much time with your children!
“My son, give me thine heart” (Prov. 23:26).
Ed. (series to be continued)