“And did not He make one? Yet had He the residue of the spirit. And wherefore one? That He might seek a godly seed. Therefore take heed to your spirit ... for the Lord, the God of Israel, saith that He hateth putting away [divorce]: for one covereth violence with his garment, saith the Lord of hosts; therefore take heed to your spirit, that ye deal not treacherously.” Malachi 2:15-16.
We all know that at one time or another we have not been happy with the man God has given us for a husband. Some wonder if they married the “right one.” They might even consider divorce. What do we do with these thoughts if they come into our mind? We know they aren’t right, but sometimes divorce may seem to be the only solution.
But is it really a solution? There are a few things we need to ponder. First of all, even if we did not marry the right man to begin with — which admittedly is the case if we know the Lord Jesus as Savior but married an unbeliever — he still became the “right man” for us the moment we said, “I do.” God hates putting away, (Mal. 2:16). He may permit separation in certain circumstances (Matt. 5:32; 1 Cor. 7:10-11). But even after infidelity God may bring healing, and even after seeking protection in an abusive situation, healing should be sought. He has shown longsuffering with His faithless bride, and He offers us His resources to do the same in our darkest hours. He states, “The woman which hath an husband that believeth not ... if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him” (1 Cor. 7:13). If God does not want us to leave an unbeliever, how much less would He choose for us to leave a believer, one of His own children.
Secondly, someone told me that whenever she had problems with her spouse, she tried to remember that the problem was not from the Lord, who wants us to live together in unity (Psa.133:1), but from the enemy of our souls, whose job it is to destroy and divide.
Also, we need to remember that if we were to leave our husband, we would still have to live with ourselves, and “in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing” (Rom. 7:18). I have pondered: If I can’t be happy with the man God has chosen for me, how could I expect to be happy with a man God has not chosen for me?