WHILE staying in the country with a Christian friend, I heard of a village, about two miles off, whose inhabitants were not allowed to hold religious meetings of any kind. The whole village was under the control of one man; and if any of the cottagers had a few of their neighbors come together into their cottage for prayer, there was only one law for them, and that was, they must give up their cottage and so leave the village.
I therefore went with some tracts, thinking to leave one at every house, and also hoped that I might be able to speak a few words to the inhabitants individually about their souls, by telling them of Jesus and His love, how He left His throne of glory, and came into this world, and died that they might have everlasting life.
The village consisted of about forty houses, very pleasantly situated on the side of a little hill facing the west. The men were mostly in the fields at work, and some of the cottage doors were fastened, the, cottagers being out doing their appointed tasks in various ways; while some few were employed at home. Those I could get access to received me very kindly, and accepted with thankfulness the little papers and books I had to give.
On my offering a tract to one old lady, and at the same time repeating to her that beautiful verse in the third chapter of the Gospel of John, "God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life," she looked at me very gravely, and said, "Yes, this is love indeed! How unlike it is to everything of earth! What does the world do for you? What has it done for me? I have been bustling about in it all my days, and it has left me a poor old woman, scarcely able to help myself, or walk across the room. But I have nothing to complain of; my needs are all supplied; I enjoy my morsel with God, and am happy!" Then putting her right hand on her breast, with her eyes beaming with joy, she said, "I have Christ here!" And then, raising the same hand, with her eyes toward heaven, she said, "I also have Christ up there, and I value a kind word spoken for Him in this world more than I do all the treasures of earth!”
I said, "This delights me very much, to hear you speak in this way. How long have you known the Lord Jesus, and been so happy?”
She replied, "I have, through mercy, known Him many years; but I was so fully occupied with the world while I was able to work, that I had but little time for reading God's precious word; but now I can do so to my heart's content, and my joy is indeed full. I long to behold Him who loved me, and washed me from my sins in His own blood; and I know I shall soon do so. When a few more days are ended, I shall see His face, and be with Him forever.”
Having spoken a few more words together of that blessed Saviour who was so precious to each of our souls, and whose face we both longed to see, I took my leave of her, and left her humble abode with feeling of the greatest delight, knowing I should surely meet her again in everlasting glory: because the Lord Jesus said, "Verily, verily, I say unto you, He that heareth my word, and believeth on Him that sent me, hath everlasting life." (John 5:24.) We could therefore rejoice together in hope of the glory of God. (Rom. 5:2; Col. 3:3, 4.)
I called at a few more cottages, giving a tract, and speaking to each individual as I had opportunity.
Soon I came to another clean old lady's door, and, offering her a little book, I smilingly said, “We are going to heaven; will you go with us?
She did not smile again, but mournfully replied, "I hope I am going to heaven, sir; but sometimes I am very much afraid I am not.”
I said, "How is it that you are so uncertain about it? Is not Christ sufficient for you? Does not His blood cleanse from all sin? Is He not now at the right hand of God for us? and is not His love the same at this moment as when He died, and rose again?”
She sorrowfully replied, "Oh! yes, I know His love is unchangeable, and I know that He has done all things well; everything which is needed for our salvation He has accomplished! The fault is my own: I am so unlike Him in every way that I very much doubt whether I ever can be with Him in glory; though the hope I sometimes have of being there fills me with delight, and it is all my joy and all my desire. I ought to be ashamed to tell you, sir, but the truth is, my heart is so deceitful; it is so little stayed on the Lord, and ever ready to run after every little thing but Him, however trifling it may be; and it grieves me continually to know it is so. I strive against it, but seem to have no power.”
“I can truly feel for you," I replied. “I know what it is to have suffered very much from the same thing myself, I therefore know the cause of your misgivings, and also the reason why you have so little power in your soul. You have not vet found your all in Christ by believing in Him; you forget that He is in the presence of God for you. This being the case, how can you do anything else but doubt; because you are looking at what you yourself are and not at what Christ is for you. And you see yourself so unfit for God's presence that 'you think you never can be there. Neither could you ever be, did it depend upon what you are. But it does not; it depends on what Christ is for you, in the presence of God. And He is for you everything you can possibly need, either in this world or in that which is to come. He has borne your grief and carried your sorrows. He has put away sin by the sacrifice of Himself. Therefore it is your privilege, and should be your delight, to turn away from yourself altogether, and think of Him and His precious blood. You would then be happy by seeing yourself in Him, who is altogether lovely, because believers are accepted in the Beloved (Eph. 1:6), and are loved of God as He is loved. (John 17:23.) Realizing this, you will have joy and confidence in your soul, and power to walk so as to please Him in this world. We get power to walk for God down here just in proportion as we are occupied with Christ up there.”
She then said, "Ah! sir, but I have not walked for God as I ought. I have not been faithful; indeed, I am just the opposite to what I ought to be. I wish it was not so! Sometimes when I am quite alone, reading my Bible, I am happy, very happy, and can forget this world, and all its cares.
But I so soon lose my joy, and have to go on again in 'sorrow and darkness without any assurance of soul. The Lord Jesus says, ' My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me: and I give unto them eternal life, and they shall never perish, neither shall any man pluck them out of My hand.' But I hear His voice so seldom, and follow Him so feebly, that I often think I am none of His.”
I said, "But I am sure you are; and if I were to be looking at myself and my walk in the way you are, I should be filled with darkness and sorrow, and should have the same doubts and fears which you have. But we are never told in God's word to do so, but to look unto Jesus, and remember that it is in Him we stand, and that it is in His loveliness that we are so lovely and precious in God's sight. We never get any good by looking at ourselves or anything down here upon earth; because our heart always becomes filled with whatever we are looking at.
Therefore, if we are looking at this world, through which we are passing, our hearts get filled with it; and if at ourselves, then our heart becomes full of self; or if with each other, then we get occupied with each other. But if we are looking at Christ, then our hearts are filled with Him; and so beholding, as in a glass, the glory of the Lord, we are thereby changed into the same image, from glory to glory, by the Spirit of the Lord. We can never walk properly for God, only as we are enjoying Christ in our souls; and if our hearts are not filled with Him, present things are sure to fill them, in one way or another, so producing darkness of mind. But when we are full of Christ, then we are strong and happy. But if with other things, then we are weak and sorrowful. We must have to do with the world as we pass along, but how happy to remember that we are not of the world even as Christ is not of the world! This gives real power.”
She answered, "I know it to be so, and I am a great loser; but I do not think of the world because I delight in it; neither do I look at myself because I am pleased with myself, for I myself am the most loathsome thing I know. I hate my life because of sin; for I seem made up of it. It is interwoven with all I do or say. And as for the world, there is nothing in it but I would be glad to forget forever, if I could. But I cannot; the world seems in my heart.”
I said, "Neither will it be otherwise, until you give Christ His right place. Then you will be able to forget the world and all its cares, knowing that He careth for you. (1 Peter 5:7.) Your heart being filled with Him, there will be no room in it for other things. The world will lose its hold upon you, and you will be able to pass in and out, doing your little duties in it; knowing that you are not of the world, seven as Christ is not of the world. (John 17:14.) It will then be under Your feet, instead of being in your heart, and the joy of the Lord will be your strength to walk so as to please Him. We are told to 'Rejoice in the Lord alway; and again I say, Rejoice.' (Phil. 4:4.) We arc never told in Scripture to rejoice in ourselves, or in circumstances, or in each other; but in the Lord. It is quite right to loathe ourselves because of sin, and those who love God will surely do so; but, on the other hand, believers should be always rejoicing in Christ, knowing that He has died that we might live, and His blood cleanseth from all sin; it makes us whiter than snow before God; we are delivered from the power of darkness, and translated into the kingdom of His dear Son; so that our proper home is the Father's house, and we are on our way to it. And feeling, as we do, our weakness and infirmities as we pass along, should make us cleave to Him all the more; but we ought not to allow these things to fill us with doubts and fears; but on the other hand it is our privilege to look on with joy to that happy day when the Lord Jesus will come and take us to Himself, change these vile bodies, and fashion them like unto His glorious body. Then we shall be like Him indeed. We shall then have up there that which we have so longed for down here.”
She then said, "You will not understand, sir, that I give way to sin. I thank God this is not the case. They think me very good, and speak of me as such; but it is not, what I do, but it is what I am in myself which gives me so much sorrow.”
I replied, "No, I do not think for one moment that you give way to sin; you hate it too much to do that: but what you want is power to enjoy God in your soul, and honor Christ before men.
And this you will get the very moment you give Him His right place in your heart, by taking Him as your all.”
She answered, "This is what I do desire; and I know He is honored by a happy trust in all He has said and done; and I ought not to dishonor Him by doubting His word. And I do hope, for the future, I shall not be so, but be enabled to look away from myself and sin, and the world, and everything connected with it, and find my rest and joy in Christ alone.”
I said, "I pray God that it may be so with you: so will your remaining clays on earth be more to the glory of God and the blessing of your own soul. And you will also be a blessing to those about you; because when we are enjoying Christ ourselves, God often makes us the happy instrument of helping others to enjoy Him. Being happy ourselves, we help others to be happy.”
Thereupon she thanked me very much, and I took my leave of her, being fully assured that when we met again it would either be in the glory with Christ, or seeking to glorify Him upon earth.
I then went to all the other cottages which I could get access to, and found two more feeble, doubting ones, but who, I fully believe, I shall meet again in that day of glory.
In these two cases which I have' attempted to describe, I think we have a clear description of that which makes the difference between a happy and an unhappy Christian in this world; for they were 'both children of God, both heirs of glory through faith in Christ, and were both on their way to the Father's house,, where they will enjoy His company forever. What made such a great difference to their joy and peace as they passed along through this world was that the one was occupied with herself and the things around her, and therefore was full of weakness and sorrow; but the other was occupied with Christ and glory, and therefore was full of joy and strength.
This is always the case. If you find a Christian who is unhappy, you will always find he is thinking of himself or something down here which is not Christ; but on the other hand, if you find a truly happy Christian, you will find the Lord Jesus to be the great theme of his soul. It must be so if we wish to honor Him; for all our springs are in Him. We need Him for every step of our journey, as well as we do to first take us up.
We can no more walk in His steps by our own strength than we can save our own souls. We need Christ for the one as much as we do for the other. Without Him we can do nothing.
H. T.