Mrs. C. was once known in her native town as fond of the world in its dress and vain pursuits. She was elegant in appearance, and full of life in society. But the Searcher of hearts knew that under all this, there was a conscience which filled her with misery, even when to those around she seemed to be the merriest of the merry.
At about the age of ten she had been placed with a Christian lady for two years, when she was taught to search the Scriptures, and to commit portions to memory. This lady was eminent in her day for devotedness to her Saviour, and the child was deeply impressed through her teaching and example. But the parents did not appreciate this, and Sarah was removed to a school, where all that ministered to personal vanity was cultivated. The result was an early marriage with a man who had no object beyond the passing scene.
Mrs. C. was almost beyond middle age, when the writer first spoke to her about her soul. A secret spring was touched which brought out an opening of her heart to the deep wretchedness which had been hidden so many years, and which had never been confessed before to another.
Earnest desire was expressed to be able to surrender herself to God, and to take her place among the people of God, whom she had been accustomed to hear ridiculed by her thoughtless friends. But fear of losing her social standing among her friends was with her a sad hindrance, and so she despaired.
One day she sent for the writer and her first words were, “The Lord has laid hold of me at last.” She then expressed a fear that she was suffering from an internal disease. A medical consultation was held, and she was pronounced incurable. What agony then seized her in the remembrance of a life spent in pursuing this vain world, while she knew in her heart that God’s Spirit would have led her heavenwards from childhood. But grace triumphed, and after a period of deep exercise, she found rest and peace through the blood of Christ. The Scriptures learned in childhood were brought vividly to mind by the Holy Spirit, and when intense suffering shut out the ministry of others to her, she was fed and comforted through what had been so deeply rooted in her young memory.
Disease made rapid strides, and in a few weeks, during which she labored to warn all her friends not to throw life away, as she had done, she departed to be with Christ, in the full assurance of perfect redemption.
There was, however, one special source of regret, and she many times expressed it even to the last, “If I could be permitted only once to take my place among the people of God before all the town, I should esteem it my highest honor on earth.” These were her words, spoken with solemn emphasis. It was too late. The opportunity for confessing Christ before men, according to His Word, was lost forever.
Reader, consider this; and if you are one who cannot surrender position in life, even for His sake who died for you, let this account speak to your heart and conscience.