From a child I had been anxious about my soul, and would often go to my mother and tell her how troubled I was. Not being converted herself and depending on her own good works she would advise me to pray more, and to be more careful about keeping the commandments. If I did these, she knew the Lord would take me to heaven when I died.
Although I tried to be good and obedient, I failed as all do, who depend on their own good works. I grew more dissatisfied with myself, for though I went to church and Sunday School regularly, I was wholly ignorant of the plan of salvation.
One day a school friend called and invited me to go with her to hear an evangelist preach. He took for his text Isaiah 6, and as he described the state of a lost soul, I trembled with fear, for it was my case exactly, and holding down my head I wept bitterly. He then told of the love of God in sending Jesus, His Son, to die for us. But I had not faith to believe that Christ became my substitute, and took my sins upon Himself, and put them all away, so that in God’s sight it is the same as though I had been crucified.
A friend seeing my distress, begged me to take God at His word, and to trust in Jesus, but I could not; I thought I had to improve before Jesus would forgive me, I went home feeling much worse than when I went to the meeting. Going to my room I prayed earnestly for God to save me. That night I had a strange dream, I dreamed that I had to cross an abyss, and as I stood on the edge planning how to cross, the ground upon which I was standing gave away and I went down a short distance until my feet stood upon a small ledge of rock. As I stood in that perilous position, with my eyes closed to keep me from looking down, I heard a gentle voice saying
“Trust yourself to Me, and I will save you.”
Opening my eyes, I saw on the opposite side, the Saviour with His hand out for me to take; but I was afraid to give Him my hand; for I thought, putting out my hand might cause me to lose my balance, then I would be lost forever; but I had not long to think, for the shelf of rock upon which I was standing commenced to crumble, and in a few seconds I would go with it; so in agony I held out my hand, which was quickly grasped by the firm hand of my Saviour, and as I stood by His side He looked kindly down at me and said,
“Now you are saved, never doubt any more.”
Though Satan is always ready to worry and make us doubt, the Lord is always near to support us through it all. It is such a precious thought that God looks at the believer through and in Christ, and sees no sin upon him, but covered with the righteousness of God, we are complete in Christ, our risen Head.