IN the second place let us note another decided hindrance to effectual prayer:
An Unforgiving Spirit
Our Lord’s instruction on this important subject must not be relegated to a past dispensation. In Mark 11:23-2623For verily I say unto you, That whosoever shall say unto this mountain, Be thou removed, and be thou cast into the sea; and shall not doubt in his heart, but shall believe that those things which he saith shall come to pass; he shall have whatsoever he saith. 24Therefore I say unto you, What things soever ye desire, when ye pray, believe that ye receive them, and ye shall have them. 25And when ye stand praying, forgive, if ye have ought against any: that your Father also which is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses. 26But if ye do not forgive, neither will your Father which is in heaven forgive your trespasses. (Mark 11:23‑26) He sets forth in no uncertain language the folly of expecting God to hear and answer prayer if wrath and bitterness are cherished in the heart.
The disciples had expressed their wonder at the drying up of the barren fig-tree. He uses the occasion to enforce a lesson of faith. He who does not doubt in his heart but believes that what he says shall come to pass, can remove mountains of difficulties, and He adds, “Therefore I say unto you, What things soever ye desire, when ye pray, believe that ye receive them, and ye shall have them” (vs. 24). What a promise is this! What possibilities it suggests as to the life of faith and prayer!
But our Lord does not leave so great a pledge unqualified. Not everyone can so pray. There may be that which will hinder faith, and make prayer impotent. So He immediately tells them, “And when ye stand praying, forgive, if ye have ought against any: that your Father also which is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses. But if ye do not forgive, neither will your Father which is in heaven forgive your trespasses.” Elsewhere also, He taught them to pray, “Forgive us our debts, as we forgive every one that is indebted to us.” Here, He emphasizes this aspect of forgiveness—one that is often forgotten.
It is sometimes said that this is law, while in Ephesians 4:3232And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you. (Ephesians 4:32) we have grace: “Be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake (or, in Christ) hath forgiven you.” But the two passages are in fullest agreement; they simply present two sides of the truth.
If born of God, I have been forgiven: therefore I should forgive. But, as a failing child, I daily need forgiveness myself, therefore it is incumbent on me to forgive my brother. If I cherish resentment and withhold forgiveness, I cannot pray with assurance. God has never promised to answer the prayer of one who has an unforgiving spirit.
This is undoubtedly the cause of many disappointments along this line. He who would receive from the God of all grace must keep his heart with all diligence—guarding it against malice and harshness when he has been offended or wronged in any way.
“For years,” said a brother recently, “I prayed for the conversion of an erring son, but all the time he seemed to go from bad to worse. During those years I had a bitter feeling in my heart toward a brother who, I felt, had grievously wronged me. I insisted on reparation which he refused to make. Feeling my cause was just, I held this against him, and would not overlook it. At last I realized that this thing was hindering prayer. I judged it before God, and freely forgave. Oh the liberty as I then turned to God about my son! Soon I heard with joy of his conversion. Though far from home, he was brought under the power of the gospel and led to Christ.” This brother felt that God had been waiting on him, ere answering the pleading of his heart. How many times have saints made similar confessions. An unforgiving spirit explains why thousands of petitions go apparently unheeded.
A third hindrance is suggested in James 4:3:
“Ye ask, and receive not, because ye ask amiss, that ye may consume it on your lusts.”
Selfishness is in the way. God loves us too well to grant every request of our selfish hearts. Yet how often do we forget this. Perhaps we read in the previous verse, “Ye have not, because ye ask not,” and immediately conclude that we may ask what we will, and that God is bound to give; but we have already seen that promises such as these are subject to conditions. If we delight ourselves in the Lord, He declares He will “give us the desires of our hearts” (Psa. 37:44Delight thyself also in the Lord; and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart. (Psalm 37:4)). But it is plain that he who thus finds his delight in the Lord will not ask selfishly for the gratification of carnal desires. If God does answer such prayers it is in judgment, as we shall see later on. Here the important thing to realize is that no promise is attached to the prayer of selfishness.
Suppose, for instance, I desired great wealth. Why not come to God and ask for a million dollars? If I did, would I receive it? Certainly not. God loves me too much to entrust me with any such fabulous sum unless the circumstances be most exceptional. But if I ask for His glory, a million is nothing to Him. George Muller asked and received over five millions in fifty years to feed and shelter thousands of orphan children. God honored his faith, and gave the means as required.
And in a lesser way, many of His servants can tell to His praise and glory how they have come to Him about financial and other needs in order to carry on the work committed to them, and He has answered most graciously, and demonstrated in marvelous ways that He is indeed the living God. But what He thus gives is a sacred trust to be administered for Him, not to be consumed on our own lusts.
Therefore when we pray for temporal things it is well that we search ourselves, examining our motives in the light of His word, that we be not found asking selfishly, but for His glory. And, be it remembered, it is in accordance with His will that we trust Him for food and raiment, and pray to Him to supply the necessaries of life. This is not the prayer of selfishness, but of childlike confidence. It was Christ Himself who said “Pray ye... Give us this day our daily bread.” And we have the same privilege still, for, “In everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving” we are encouraged to “let our requests be made known unto God.”
Fourthly, wrong family relationships hinder prayer. Read 1 Peter 3:1-71Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; 2While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. 3Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; 4But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. 5For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: 6Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement. 7Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honor unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered. (1 Peter 3:1‑7). Note the concluding verse of this section in which wives and husbands are being instructed as to their duties toward each other. “Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honor unto the wife as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life that your prayers be not hindered.” When wife and husband are one in heart, one in purpose, each occupying the place divinely assigned in the home, loving and honoring one another, with what boldness, what holy confidence, can they kneel together before God in prayer, counting on His unfailing grace for their households and every interest of their hearts.
But where it is otherwise, how difficult it is to pray. And if strife and discord rule, prayer together is an impossibility. Formal prayers may yet be uttered by the lips while kneeling at the family altar, but definite answers there will not be.
Surrounded by a growing family, it is well that parents carefully consider whether their own behavior towards one another, publicly and privately, is such as to help or hinder prayer. For what can be more important than that those who, under God, are responsible for their little ones, should ever live in an atmosphere of trustful prayer, counting on God for the salvation of their households, and so living before them that the impressionable hearts of the boys and girls will recognize the practical power of godliness.
One last hindrance I would notice. It is mentioned in James 1:6, 7: “Let him ask in faith nothing wavering. For he that wavereth is like a wave of the sea driven by the wind and tossed; for let not that man think that he shall receive anything of the Lord.” Wavering is really unbelief, and unbelief is the very opposite to faith, and therefore a prime hindrance to prayer.
But wavering is generally a symptom of something deeper. He who wavers may well examine himself and see whether he has not a condemning heart, an unforgiving spirit, a selfish motive, or whether there is not some definite thing in his life whereby his prayer is hindered. It is absolutely impossible to offer the prayer of faith if any of these things are present. Faith and holiness are too intimately linked to be separated. God reveals His will to one who walks before Him, and thus he is enabled to “ask in faith, nothing wavering.” Where there is no such assurance it is well to take the word of the prophet: “Let us search and try our ways, and turn again to the Lord.” “Then shall we know if we follow on to know the Lord” (Hos. 6:33Then shall we know, if we follow on to know the Lord: his going forth is prepared as the morning; and he shall come unto us as the rain, as the latter and former rain unto the earth. (Hosea 6:3)). And so we shall enter into His mind and understand His will, in order that we may pray in accordance with His word, and so without hindrance.