The Learning of Ourselves

 •  3 min. read  •  grade level: 6
It is sweet to know that peace with God, and our meetness for heaven, never depends in anywise upon what is in ourselves. Christ has made peace, by the blood of His cross (Col. 1:2020And, having made peace through the blood of his cross, by him to reconcile all things unto himself; by him, I say, whether they be things in earth, or things in heaven. (Colossians 1:20)). He announced it as made after He rose from the dead; and we come into all the fruits of His work without any effort on our part whatsoever. God has applied His work to our souls when even without strength to accept it. I rejoice to see a deep exercise of soul, as I know that He is applying that work. The very exercise proves this—a natural man would not have any. This terrible breaking-up work goes before peace with God. But God is only bringing us to know, not only that we have done evil things, but that in us dwells no good thing. We often think in these exercises how cold we are—how dead; how there is no love; how fond we are of the world—of things around us—of everything but Christ; no desire for the study of the Word—for spiritual things—much for worldly things. Surely it is bitter work to learn ourselves thus: saddest of all to find that in our flesh dwells no good; and more, that there never will be any. To will present all the while, but how to perform that which is good not found. But we are going through a process to cast us over on the rich and sovereign grace of God, who, as soon as we give up hopes of being better, allows us to discover that the “I” who would do good is really “Christ in us,” and not ourselves. Then “Christ in us “can work and bring forth fruit. Then he can produce the love and godly desires we so sadly discovered lay not in us. Grace deals with us as worthless.
You say, “I feel I don’t love God—how cold I am—I have no desires after Him-but I find I have desires after everything else.” He says, “Herein is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us, and sent His son to be the propitiation for our sins” (1 John 4:1010Herein is love, not that we loved God, but that he loved us, and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins. (1 John 4:10)). These exercises prove that God has quickened your soul into life—life is working, and what you need is liberty—not doubts. It is never said, “Hereby doubt we;” always, “Hereby know we.” You want to get your eye of yourself totally, and get it on Christ. Look within and you will find nothing but doubts. Look on Him who is in heaven, you will never get one there. Satan tries to keep you looking within-he knows, if you cease to look there you will get free. ‘Tis quite true that in our hearts there is that which troubles us much more than actual guilt: i.e., that we can find nothing good in them. ‘Tis a humiliating discovery in the face of such love as His has been to us. Still we must learn it, and when it is learned, then He is free to produce in us good fruit when we yield ourselves unto Him. It is the most distressing thing to learn the deadness of our hearts in presence of His perfect love; but learn it we must, and then we turn away from ourselves-never looking there again for anything—to Him, and the heart learns that all its fresh springs are in Christ. If it were not so, we would have something to glory in, and grace would not be grace.