ONE morning, a young man, a stranger, knocked at my door, saying that he had been advised to see me. “I cannot work, I cannot sleep, I cannot eat,” said he, with a look of intense anxiety; “I am in such misery about my soul,” adding that he felt so ill he thought he must die, and yet that he dare not die, lest he should go to hell. The doctors he had sought had given him medicine, but still he could not rest, for no sooner did he fall asleep than a text of Scripture would seem to appear upon the wall, and then, before he could read it, it would be snatched away as by a hand.
The young man, I heard afterward, had called upon every one whom he had reason to think was a Christian, and who knew the forgiveness of sins. He took every opportunity of being alone to kneel down and cry to God for pardon, but something ever seemed to say to him, “You are too bad to be saved.” He said he felt he was dying as he talked to me.
“You are dying to the pleasures of this sinful world,” was my answer. To which he replied that he could not forsake sin, for the devil had such a hold on him.
I asked him to tell me some of the sins that troubled him most. Spending his wages in the pot-house appeared to be the chief burden on his mind. Then, as he spoke of his sins, he exclaimed, “Oh, you do not know what I feel! I am too bad to be forgiven. There never was such a vile wretch as I am.”
To this I answered, that I had been just such a wretched sinner myself, until I came to Jesus, and owned to Him my lost state. I assured the young man that we are all on a level before God. That all have sinned, and come short of His glory, for there is none righteous, no, not one. Those who are without Christ are altogether lost, from the beggar on the dung hill to the king upon the throne. Having given him these texts, I assured him the Scriptures declare that there is the one Saviour for all, for “he that believeth on the Son hath everlasting life.”
The young man attended some gospel services on the following Sunday, but merely said that it was too beautiful for such a sinner as he. Shortly afterward he returned to his home by the seaside, his soul’s salvation still the one overwhelming consideration with him.
Would God, dear reader, that you, if unsaved, might be as much in earnest as he was. You must find Jesus as your Saviour while you are here in this world, and have everything as to the forgiveness of sins settled with Him, or you can never dwell with Him in heaven. Oh! be real and true; bring yourself into the true light.
This young man’s distress of soul continued for about six months. He had an unusually keen sense of his lost state before God, and he earnestly longed “to get Christ for himself,” as he expressed it. A few weeks after his return home, he saw that all his sins were atoned for by the Lord Jesus Christ. He was enabled to trust in the Saviour, and to rest in peace upon His sacrifice. He knew, through the Holy Spirit’s teaching, that “The blood of Jesus Christ, God’s Son, cleanseth us from all sin,” and, since that glad reality has been his enjoyed portion, he has been telling of the love of Christ to poor sinners.
Dear reader, God’s salvation is for those who see themselves lost and ruined in sin. In this condition it is we want mercy, and Christ has died that we may have it.
F. T.