This cry of perplexity is wrung from many a sad heart in this sin-burdened world. We are surrounded by mysteries. "Why am I thus?" goes forth from crippled ones, bedridden ones, bereaved ones, from many suffering from the consequences of the sins and follies of others where death would be welcomed as relief.
Now the poor sufferer may do one of three things.
First, he may leave God out altogether, curse his day, and bear his heavy burden all alone till death ushers him into a darker eternal gloom.
Or second, he may turn to God, charging Him with his condition, and saying, "Why hast Thou made me thus?"
Or third, he may turn to God in a broken, childlike spirit. Rebekah, in Gen. 25:2222And the children struggled together within her; and she said, If it be so, why am I thus? And she went to inquire of the Lord. (Genesis 25:22), sets us a good example. In her perplexity she "went to inquire of the LORD." This is the right and best thing to do. A full answer may not yet be given, but at least there will be peace and rest and support in the perplexity. "What I do thou knowest not now; but thou shalt know hereafter." John 13:77Jesus answered and said unto him, What I do thou knowest not now; but thou shalt know hereafter. (John 13:7). For we are but children, not capable of comprehending the full answer if it were now given. "Why am I thus?" Oh, tried one, trust, wait, hope on! "Weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning" (Psalm 30:55For his anger endureth but a moment; in his favor is life: weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning. (Psalm 30:5))—cometh never to depart. Our light affliction is but for a moment; the weight of glory is eternal.
Many a child of God afflicted and cut off by infirmity from some of the sweetest joys of life, and often looking with envious eyes on others, may sorrowfully ask, "Why am I thus?" We can only answer, / cannot tell you; you will know some day. But let me ask you, Why are you what you are? Why are you, who were a vessel of wrath, a guilty sinner, afar off, without hope, why are you now a vessel of mercy, a child of God, pardoned, brought nigh, and blessed with all spiritual blessings in Christ? Why has your poor body with its infirmities yet been made a temple of the Holy Ghost? Why did the Father give you to the Son to be one of "His own," whom He loves to the end?
These questions may well be pondered. In thinking of them we may forget our sorrows, and our souls be filled with the joy of the Lord.
"Why art thou then cast down, my soul?
What should discourage thee?
And why with vexing thoughts art thou
Disquieted in me?
"Still trust in God; for Him to praise
Good cause I yet shall have;
He of my count'nance is the health,
My God, that dolt me save."