I have felt many times I would like to tell the Lord’s dear people the way and the means He used to bring me to Himself, to know Him as my own dear Saviour.
I joined the army, and lived a careless and indifferent life, caring only for the things of this world. Regardless of my immortal soul, I continued that course of life, but could not help knowing that the Holy Spirit was striving with me. Sometimes I would be on my knees before the Lord, and at other times as careless as ever. Often those words have come to me,
“My Spirit shall not always strive with man.”
I knew it was the Spirit of God that was striving with me, and I used to dread the thought of the Spirit of God leaving me to myself.
But, blessed be the Lord, it was the Shepherd seeking the lost sheep. He sought me, and He found me. It was one Lord’s Day, that the Lord spoke to me again, while I was at a meeting. It was nothing that was going on in the services, but a verse of a hymn that I had often heard my dear mother sing, and had sung myself when a boy. The words were these—
“One there is above all others,
O, how He loves.”
I shall never forget that moment, so real was it, as if the Lord had spoken to me from glory, though this hymn was not being sung. It was not then that I found peace, although I received it the same day.
Myself and two other men were put in charge of a small battery or fort, and this day, after we had had our dinner, one of the men went to the gate and found a tract which someone had put through the door of entrance into the fort. He picked it up, and just looked at it, and then gave it to me. The Lord had sent someone with it as a message to my soul. The piece which was used of the Lord for my conversion was,
“How a Sinner can get Saved.”
These words brought peace to my soul. The writer was shown how the Israelites only had to look to the brazen serpent; and I could see it so plainly that I was to look to Christ by faith, and live.
Before that, I had not realized what sin was in God’s sight, nor yet what a sinner I had been. But now all the sins of my past life seemed to rise up before me as they had never done before, and I was in greater darkness than ever. Satan was using all his power, and telling me that had only been deceiving myself, and that it was impossible for the Lord to forgive me, for I had been too bad.
Not knowing what to do, I was almost despairing about what I had been. The Lord then spoke to me in a still, small voice by His Word,
“The blood of Jesus Christ, God’s Son, cleanseth us from all sin,” and I said,
“Yes, Lord, it does,” and a sweeter peace filled my soul than had ever done before. Since then I have not had a doubt. All praise be to the Lord, who works in mysterious ways.
When I think of all His love to me I can but praise Him. All His dealings with me have been wonderful. This last year again, He had led me into fuller light, giving me to know Christ as the object of my heart, and gathering me out to His precious name.
I felt, dear brother, in writing these few lines, showing you the Lord’s dealings with one so unworthy, that you would be able to praise Him and thank Him that your work of faith and labor of love is not in vain in the Lord. To Him be all the praise and glory, for He is worthy. I would love to know the dear one who put the tract through the gate. I have it still, and it is very precious to me.