When my children were young I was given godly counsel: “Never discipline your child in anger.” Deal with your anger first, and then discipline in the fear of God.
Behold “the goodness and severity of God” (Rom. 11:2222Behold therefore the goodness and severity of God: on them which fell, severity; but toward thee, goodness, if thou continue in his goodness: otherwise thou also shalt be cut off. (Romans 11:22)). You notice that goodness comes first. Let our children see that no matter how disobedient they are, we still love them. The Father didn’t go to the far country to hunt for his prodigal son, but no one could doubt the love with which he welcomed him home.
What sort of discipline should I use in training my children? Proverbs says the rod. The world may shout against this, but all that the world knows is human nature and human anger. God doesn’t give a rule book of specific deeds with specific consequences. Not all children are alike; let God show you what to do.
It is not necessary that they should understand your choices for them. If they only obey when they understand, they will treat God the same. Maybe you explain, maybe you don’t, especially when they are younger. Obedience does not require explanation.
Discipline involves training our child, that is, leading him by example to become a follower of Christ, a disciple of Christ. God did not make any mistake in giving these precious good gifts to you. Children are a heritage of the Lord.