THE following Sunday I did not go to the church. It was the week of preparation for the celebration of the great Day of Atonement, which the Jews call the ‘awful days.’ I spent that week in much prayer, fasting, and weeping, in order that on the Day of Atonement my name might be enrolled in the book of life, and be blotted out of the book of death, wherein the Jews believe their names to be found without ‘prayer, penitence and alms.’ I went to the synagogue as usual, but at the close of the day I felt, as I had never before, that my fasting, prayers and tears had not atoned for my sins, which I knew required forgiveness. My conscience was aroused, but my wrong-doing stared me in the face, Judaism gave me a consciousness of sin in feeling that I had transgressed the law of God, but could not point me to a Mediator by which I could be freed from its condemnation.
“This made me so very wretched that I was quite ill the next day, and unable to leave my bed for some hours. As the people with whom I lived were great church-goers, I went downstairs in the evening in the hope of being instructed and edified by their conversation. I told them how I felt, and I fully expected to receive some comfort or Christian advice from them; but, alas! seeking Christians, I found infidels. Mrs. E— , who was a lady of a very excitable temperament, and, as I afterwards learned, had a great horror of practical Christianity, in reply to my inquiries, coolly remarked
“‘I have noticed something strange about you within the last week or so, and my advice will be that you should see a doctor and not neglect yourself; if neglected, the consequences may prove to be serious. At the same time,’ she said, with an air of self-sufficiency, ‘I must tell you, Mr. M—, I have no sympathy with people changing their religion. The Apostle Paul says, “Let every man abide in the same calling wherein he was called,” and I say let everybody remain in the religion he was born. I can tolerate a heathen becoming a Christian, but I do not see why a Jew should leave his religion, which is as good as any other. There was a collection in our church last Sunday to convert your people, and not a penny did I give towards it, although the plate was put under my nose. I did not care for that; they could not get anything out of me. I did not see why we should meddle with the Jews; they are harmless, inoffensive, and a good set of people. The friend whom I consider the best Christian in the world is a Jew, that is my husband’s partner, and I daresay there is not a more honest, straightforward gentleman than he; and I am not ashamed to tell you, Mr. M—, that it was that gentleman who took my husband by the hand, and made him what he is. It is a great pity we cannot leave the Jews alone. They do not try to convert us, and I don’t see why we should disturb them by trying to convert them. As to myself, I believe they are as safe for heaven in believing in Moses as we are in Christ.’
“‘My dear,’ said Mr. Eto his wife, ‘you need not put yourself into such a state of excitement; Mr. Mis not going to be a convert to the Jews’ Society, he has nothing to gain by becoming a Christian. I can see what is the matter with him; a few evenings at the theatre will soon dispel the gloom which is evidently on his mind. Is that not so, Mr. M—?’ he asked.
“I could not make any reply; in fact, I did not know what to make of them, and I retired to my room greatly disappointed and unhappy. As I could not shake off my convictions, it is easy to imagine what were my feelings. I was longing for Sunday to come. I was anxious to hear and learn more about Jesus, who had already become so very interesting to me.
“The blessed day arrived, and I was at the church doors before they were opened. The service appeared more solemn and impressive to me than on the previous Sunday. I was astonished with another extraordinary text, for the first Sunday’s discourse was so applicable to my position. Gen. 49:1010The sceptre shall not depart from Judah, nor a lawgiver from between his feet, until Shiloh come; and unto him shall the gathering of the people be. (Genesis 49:10): ‘The scepter shall not depart from Judah, nor a lawgiver from between his feet, until Shiloh come, and unto him shall the gathering of the people be.’ He went on to say: ‘By scepter and lawgiver is meant the ruling and legislative power that in the process of time did settle and center in that tribe of Judah; it began in David, who was of that tribe, and continued for some centuries. Though there was some variety in the form of government, yet the law and polity among the Jews were the same. By Shiloh is meant the Messiah. This might be proved from the signification of the word, as also from the following words, “To him shall the gathering of the people be,” or, as some read it, “To him shall the obedience of the nation be.” Now to whom can this be applied but to the Messiah, unto whom it is elsewhere promised, the nations of the earth were to be blessed in Him (Gen. 12:33And I will bless them that bless thee, and curse him that curseth thee: and in thee shall all families of the earth be blessed. (Genesis 12:3); Gal. 3:88And the scripture, foreseeing that God would justify the heathen through faith, preached before the gospel unto Abraham, saying, In thee shall all nations be blessed. (Galatians 3:8)). The Jewish doctors thus render, or rather paraphrase upon this prophecy: “Kings shall not cease from the house of Judah, nor doctors that teach the law from his children’s children, until the time that King Messiah do come, whose kingdom the earth is, and all the nations of the earth shall be subjected to Him.” From the words thus explained I say, if the scepter and lawgiver have departed from Judah, then is the Messiah already come. The Jews cannot but acknowledge that for centuries there has been no such thing as a tribe of Judah in any national or political institution. It is evident, beyond all contradiction, that the whole Jewish nation has been scattered over the face of the earth, and had for many generations no law and no government of their own amongst themselves. This is not only confessed, but lamented by some of their most learned Rabbis, who on Hosea thus write: “These are the days of our captivity, wherein we have neither king nor priest of Israel; but we are in the power of the Gentiles, and under the power of their kings and princes.” I say, if there be any truth or certainty in the text, then Shiloh, or the Messiah, is already come, and the Lord Jesus is that Messiah, who (Isaiah 538He was taken from prison and from judgment: and who shall declare his generation? for he was cut off out of the land of the living: for the transgression of my people was he stricken. (Isaiah 53:8) tells us) was wounded for our transgressions, who was bruised for our iniquities... and with whose stripes we are healed. The fountain of Christ’s love is open to all and for all; whether Jew or Gentile, all must come to Him for salvation, and none can be saved without coming to Him as the atonement for their sins.’
“My heart was softened and penitent at these words. All my sins came before me, and I felt myself a lost sinner before God, and that night I had no sleep. I was in the greatest agony of soul. The text, ‘The scepter shall not depart from Judah, nor a lawgiver from between his feet, until Shiloh come,’ was ringing in my ears, and ever saying to myself: ‘Has not the scepter departed from Judah? Where is the lawgiver from between his feet? Has Shiloh come?’ I tried to pray, but could not, or rather was reluctant to pray in the name of Jesus. I wept bitterly before God, and implored Him, for the sake of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, His friends, to send me peace, but no peace came. The very heaven appeared brass to me. The struggle of that moment I can never forget.
“At last I opened my Bible, which I had bought the week before, and the first words I saw were these: ‘As Moses lifted up the serpent in the wilderness, even so must the Son of man be lifted up; that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, but have eternal life.’ Light from heaven broke in on my dark and troubled spirit; I saw in Jesus the Messiah, the Saviour of my soul, and was enabled to cry out in devout admiration and praise, ‘My Lord and my God!’ No sooner had I offered this prayer than my burden was removed; the peace of God which passeth all understanding entered into my soul. I felt that the Lord Jesus Christ was crucified for me, to redeem my soul from death, and innumerable as my sins were, He had graciously washed them all away with His atoning blood; and, blessed be God, the truth that brought peace to my conscience has day by day increased and become precious to me.
“When the great change which had taken place in me became known to my family, they first used gentle means with me in the hope of bringing me back to Judaism; but finding I grew bold by preaching the gospel to them, they resorted to harsh treatment. It was a season of deep trial to my soul, but nothing could move me from the Cove of God in Christ Jesus my Lord. This state of things increased my ardent desire to confess the Lord Jesus Christ before the world. And oh! Mr. M—,” he said in conclusion, “I cannot describe to you my inward joy, not only of meeting you as a Christian, but that the Lord has enabled me, this day, to bear testimony to that gospel which has proved to be to me ‘the power of God unto salvation.’”
Here my dear friend ceased. I had listened with deep emotion to the recital of his search after truth and his ultimate conversion, and our eyes were wet with tears of joy as we clasped each other’s hands in gratitude to God.
But my next anxiety was, if possible, to find some suitable situation for my friend, who had made every sacrifice for his new principles.
The very next day Mr. G— asked me whether I knew anyone who could replace me in the office. Mr. Mat once occurred to me as most suitable to fill the position I occupied, and I related to Mr. G— the interesting service I had witnessed yesterdays to which he listened with deep attention, and at last he said, “He will do, Mr. M—; send him here whenever you like.” I communicated with my friend that evening; he saw Mr. G—on Wednesday, and was accepted; and the day I left for the Continent I saw him sitting at my desk, contented and happy.
A fortnight passed before we again met. I was then sitting quietly by his bedside, when he turned to me, and said, “What a blessed thing it is to lay quite still and let the Saviour do everything.”
Beloved reader, are you ready to receive Christ? to cease from all efforts of your own, and to let the Saviour do everything?
He lingered on many weeks after this, suffering very acutely, yet growing in grace and in the knowledge of his God and Saviour; to whose saving power and mercy he delighted to bear testimony. When he at length passed away, he had a joyous entrance into the everlasting kingdom of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ. And I fervently thank God for those precious five minutes during which he first received the truth as it is in Jesus.
(To be continued)