When I was a lad in my teens the thing that troubled me more than anything else was a text of Scripture that hung in our home. Four words only was the length of it; but those four words emblazoned themselves upon my mind, and made me afraid on most unexpected occasions. The four words were "THOU GOD SEEST ME.”
I had been taught that "God is love"; that He sought my greatest blessing, and desired that I should be happy forever. I knew that He "so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth on Him might not perish, but have everlasting life"; and yet I was afraid. Many times I wished that there were no God and that the text were a delusion.
Is it strange that I felt like that? The reason is not hard to find. I was a sinner, and I knew that all my sins were on record in God's Book-that there were no mistakes in His book-keeping, and that I could not erase a single entry in it. It was true in my case, as in all others, that―
"The moving finger writes―
And having writ, moves on;
Nor all my piety nor wit
Can lure it back to cancel half a line,
Nor all my tears blot out one word of it.”
About that time I read a story by a famous writer in which he suggested that the recording angel often dropped a tear of pity upon the page whereon he had recorded some sin, as though he could wash it out.
I wished the suggestion were true, but I knew it was not. I read also, in the one Book that always tells the truth, of the time when the dead, small and great, shall stand before God; when the books shall be opened and the dead judged out of the things written in the books, every man according to his works (Rev. 20:11-1511And I saw a great white throne, and him that sat on it, from whose face the earth and the heaven fled away; and there was found no place for them. 12And I saw the dead, small and great, stand before God; and the books were opened: and another book was opened, which is the book of life: and the dead were judged out of those things which were written in the books, according to their works. 13And the sea gave up the dead which were in it; and death and hell delivered up the dead which were in them: and they were judged every man according to their works. 14And death and hell were cast into the lake of fire. This is the second death. 15And whosoever was not found written in the book of life was cast into the lake of fire. (Revelation 20:11‑15)). It was this that made the text a trouble to me, so much so that often at night I would bury my face in my pillow in the vain endeavor to blot it out from my thoughts.
Then one night I attended a Gospel service. Again I heard old truths clearly and powerfully preached. At the close of it I was impelled to stay to a second meeting, at which the preacher announced that we would sing the hymn:
"Oh, do not let the Word depart,
And close thine eyes against the light,
Poor sinner, harden not thy heart,
Be saved, now, tonight.”
I tried to sing that verse with the rest of the congregation, but I couldn't. A lump rose to my throat, and tears came to my eyes. I had been hardening my heart for a long time against the love of a Savior God, and I hoped now that nobody would see my anxiety and grief. But the preacher had a keen eye for anxious sinners, and presently he sat down by my side.
Putting his arm around me, he gave me a warm hug and said, "You'll trust Him tonight, won't you, Sonny?”
I had no need to ask him who he meant by "Him." I knew that he was speaking of JESUS, the only begotten Son of God, who had died that I might live, who had shed His precious blood that my sins might all be washed away. Swallowing hard, I replied to the preacher's question, "Yes, I will trust Him tonight.”
The preacher said no more. He took my answer to be my decision, which it was. Then he announced, "We'll sing,
“‘Tis done, the great transaction's done,
I am my Lord's, and He is mine.
He drew me, and I followed on,
Glad to confess His voice divine.
Happy day! Happy day!
When Jesus washed my sins away.”
I could not sing the words then, my heart was too full; but I sang them before I slept that night. And I can still sing them today as I look back to that solemn but blessed hour.
I am not now afraid of the text that once troubled me so. On the contrary, I rejoice that every deed of mine, ever the most sinful, is seen by God. Not one act escapes His notice. It is my joy to realize that, knowing all, He has forgiven all.
Such a forgiveness as this God offers to all. It is a complete clearance, and it is offered freely through faith in the Lord Jesus Christ.
"Be it known unto you therefore, men and brethren, that through THIS MAN is preached unto you the forgiveness of sins: And by Him all that believe are justified from all things, from which ye could not be justified by the law of Moses.”
"As Moses lifted up the serpent in the
wilderness, even so must the Son of
man be lifted up: that whosoever
believeth in Him should not perish,
but have eternal life.”
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