"And He answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that He which made them at the beginning made them male and female, and said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife, and they twain shall be one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.
"They say unto Him, Why did Moses then command to give a writing of divorcement, and to put her away I He saith unto them, Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, suffered you to put away your wives, but from the beginning it was not so."
(* This article seems to have been written in the presence only of scenes in England. Had the bearing of what is passing in. Prussia, Switzerland, etc., and what has passed in Madeira, the South American Isles, China, etc., been before the writer's mind, the importance-1. of our having a code on marriage and divorce from God Himself, and-2. of the living assembly of God clown here on earth holding itself responsible to God for the observance of it, would doubtless have been more fully opened up.
Where God's mind has been expressed in Scripture, He holds His assembly down here on earth, if He has one, responsible to see. His mind carried out into practice.-EDITOR.)
AN old proverb says, " Marriages are made in heaven," and in a certain sense I believe it to be true; I mean in the sense of the preceding words-namely, that husband and wife being one flesh is of Divine ordaining, and their oneness is a oneness of God's own making. “What, therefore, God hath joined together, let not man put asunder."
What then is marriage? I believe that but comparatively few are rightly instructed concerning it, and that many and many enter into and continue in the state, without ever having understood its divine origin, or sought divine sanction.
In the majority of minds the bond of marriage depends on a legal ceremony of some kind or another, performed in what is called a place of worship, a registrar's office, or other lawfully appointed place. Their thoughts rise no higher than this. Connected with this legal act, there is often, indeed almost generally, the desire for a religious act, hence the preference shown by most persons for marriage in a " church." But if we search God's word, where truth alone is to be found, whether concerning things eternal or things temporal, we learn that marriage in His thoughts depends not either upon a legal or a religious observance. " He that made them in the beginning," (" the beginning," when there was neither legal nor religious ceremony known), " He which made them in the beginning, made them male and female, and said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife, and they twain shall be one flesh." That is, He which in the beginning made them two, namely, male and female, ordained that in their union they should become one, and that for this cause (because of this new oneness, which He had made out of twain), a man shall leave father and mother, that is, he shall forsake the nearest and closest of existing natural ties, and cleave to that new tie, that other, who is now made one with himself" his own flesh " (Eph. 5:2929For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church: (Ephesians 5:29)). Then, adds the Lord Jesus to those who raised the question, " What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder."
" What God hath joined together." Is not this then something more than a legal or religious ceremonial? Surely it is. It is a mystery, but withal it is God's truth, and not all the sin, nor all the confusion which sin has brought into this most solemn and sacred subject, can alter the fact, that the man and the woman who mutually agree and consent to live together, are in the sight of God "one flesh," joined together by God's own ordinance, and of such and to such it is said, " let not man put asunder."
But it will perhaps be asked, are the legal or the religious ceremonies then to be put aside, for you speak as if they were unnecessary. No, I answer, by no means; but we must give them their right places. Neither legal nor religious ceremony makes marriage as before God, but like Moses' bill of divorcement, legal marriage is necessary because of the hardness of men's hearts.
The laws of men are necessary because of man's natural lawlessness and sin. So the law of every country as to marriage is needful because of the lawlessness of man, and his utter ignorance of, or disobedience to, the ordained and revealed will of God upon the subject.
The: law, therefore, says that unless the man and woman appear before a legally appointed authority, and witnesses, and declare their consent, which act is then and there registered, their union is not marriage but sin.
The Christian, therefore, who is subject: to the powers that be, " and owns that they are ordained of God," gladly on his part complies with the law of the land in which he dwells, and conforms to whatever rule the law requires of him to render his marriage valid in the sight of man; but for all that, he must know that mere legal compliance will not suffice as before God, however needful it may be as subjection to man's ordinance for the Lord's sake.
I say the legal ceremony will not suffice before God, and I say so for the following reason. What the law joins together, the law can put asunder. A legal marriage can be legally dissolved. The law tolerates divorce. It does not profess to rise to the divine standard. It says to the man and the woman, " If you mutually desire it, I will bind you legally, and give you certain legal rights as married, and if you disagree, I will, under certain conditions, loose you again, and you shall be free. I f you then desire to remarry, I will bind you again, and it shall be all legal,' from beginning to end." The law does not, cannot own that God has joined together, and that even though sin may outwardly separate, the divine decree remains unchanged,- they whom He has joined are inseparably " one flesh."
The law does not profess to dissolve the relationship of parent aid child but ignorant, of the divine ordinance of marriage, it professes to dissolve the relationship of husband and wife, which God has put on higher grounds than the former.
It is evident, therefore, that the legal idea of marriage comes short of the requirements of God, for He, who is. above all law says, " What God hath joined together let not man put asunder," and He then explains that the divorce permitted. by Moses was not so "from the beginning,"- was a thing tolerated because of the hardness of heart of the children of Israel. That is, they were so. carnal that divorce was permitted to avoid worse evils.
The Lord Jesus, however, does not confirm the permission of Moses; and thus to those who are under grace, to Christians in fact, as distinguished from Israelites under law, there is no toleration for divorce.; The workings of the flesh, and the hardness of the heart, are not legalized nor consented to, but are to be judged, and all their fruits condemned and mortified; but nevertheless Paul is permitted to say, " let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband," (1 Cor. 7:22Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband. (1 Corinthians 7:2)). Blessed permission of a gracious God who knoweth the frames, the necessities of His poor creatures, who cares for their joys, and for their sorrows, and who says still " It is not good for the man to be alone." (Compare Gen. 2:1818And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him. (Genesis 2:18), John 17:1111And now I am no more in the world, but these are in the world, and I come to thee. Holy Father, keep through thine own name those whom thou hast given me, that they may be one, as we are. (John 17:11), Eph. 5:25,3325Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; (Ephesians 5:25)
33Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband. (Ephesians 5:33).)
What, then, is required of those who desire to marry? I write more especially for Christians, for those who know and believe the love of God in Christ, who take His name, and who thus through grace are able to know and do His will.
Firstly, let us remember (even if it humble us) that though marriage is good and blessed, yet to be unmarried, free for God and Christ, is better (1 Cor. 7:1,7,8,27,29). To walk in the Spirit, above the claims and affections of nature in this matter, is a higher path than to follow nature: " But every man hath his proper gift of God, and if thou marry thou hest not sinned " (1 Cor. 7), and the Lord himself says, " All men cannot receive this saying " (Matt. 19:1111But he said unto them, All men cannot receive this saying, save they to whom it is given. (Matthew 19:11)).
If, then, marriage is your desire, seek to know the mind of God concerning it (and this is equally needed by those who are already united). Do not measure marriage by man's standard, nor limit it to what is often called by its name in an evil world. Remember that the union of those whose hearts are leading them, or have led them together, is inseparable. God made the woman for the man, and yet neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the man in the Lord (1 Cor. 11:9-119Neither was the man created for the woman; but the woman for the man. 10For this cause ought the woman to have power on her head because of the angels. 11Nevertheless neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the man, in the Lord. (1 Corinthians 11:9‑11)). He made them the one for the other, and being joined they are one in the flesh, even as it is true "in the Lord," and none can separate. Never mind what sin has done, or is doing in this evil world, but hold fast what God says about it, not only in its first institution, but in " the great mystery," the type of human marriage, " I speak concerning Christ and the Church " (Eph. 5:3232This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church. (Ephesians 5:32)). There in that wondrous mystery, the union of Christ and His bride-the two made one-is seen the thought of God concerning the union of man and wife, of whom He says, " Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh." None can separate that which God hath joined together in Christ, and let none put asunder those whom God hath made one in flesh.
And next as to your individual case, there should be, surely, perfect conviction before God _and before one another that the proposed step is according to His will. It is greatly to be feared that many enter on marriage without any such conviction, or any dealings with God about the matter. The motives are often low and altogether unworthy of the Christian calling, or such as should dictate his acts. To ensure a good and peaceful they profess, and many sincerely desire to ask the blessing and sanction of God upon their act. But the ceremony in such places constitutes, by law, a legal marriage, and we have seen that what the law binds, it can also loose. Is it right, therefore, to seek the divine sanction on marriage, in an act which comes quite short of the divine ordinance? Can we, if we think of it, honestly come into the presence of Him, who says, "Let not man put asunder" in a form or ceremony, which can be undone or dissolved? Surely we cannot, and thus the ordinary combination of the legal and religious ceremony in one act, only proves what I said at the first, that the divine thought of marriage is but little understood, and moreover, that in a day of professing Christianity, marriage law is still based upon the standard and permission of Moses, as adapted for the people of Israel, and is not founded upon what " God made in the beginning," " and SAID," and confirmed by the lips of the Lord Jesus Christ.
Christians-believers who know God in Christ, will' bow to His word, and who desire to be in communion with His thoughts, and to own His will in all things-ought not then to approach Him in that which is confessedly short of His requirements, but in any religion: act in which they seek His blessing and sanction on their marriage, they should do so in spirit and in truth.
They should bear in mind the distinction as to marriage in the laws of men and in the ordinance of God and then give to each the recognition which is due. I: man's law requires a certain observance, observe it. If God claims a higher motive and acknowledgment, render them to Him.
And in the land in which we live, the Lord has in His goodness made the path for faith and conscience ver) easy. The Christian in this country can satisfy the claims of man's law, without being compelled to combine ( with it a religious element distressing to the conscience for the law of England permits the registry of marriage apart from any religious ceremony whatever.
It may then perhaps be asked, what more then is necessary, if the motive is pure, and the marriage ha been legally registered, that may suffice?
But I would answer, though it may suffice for the worldling, or for the one who gladly avails himself of the registry office, to evade anything like religious form or profession, (as many do in this age of growing infidelity,) it is not enough for the Christian, who should desire the prayers and fellowship of fellow-believers, in seeking the blessing and sanction of God upon his marriage. And for this end, how blessed and real a thing after having complied with the law's demands, to assemble with those " who call on the name of the Lord out of a pure heart,". and seeking their prayers and fellowship in the marriage, solemnly confess before them and to God, that in it His own institution is owned and recognized, that those whom He joins together may not be put asunder.
It has been truly said by a servant of God, that the Church of God claims a higher confession from the believer in his marriage than the law of man. The Church has a right to ask, and to expect, that the believer shall enter upon marriage on higher grounds than mere outward conformity to a legal observance; and more than this, the assembly with which remains the presence of Christ and of His Spirit, must judge, and may even withhold its sanction and fellowship in any doubtful case which may come before it, for it is evident that there might be marriage which, though legal, the assembly could not sanction, and on account of which communion at the table of the Lord might even be withheld from those contracting it. Hence the propriety of separating the two acts, conformity to the law, and the seeking and blessing God in the presence of His people.
I would now briefly recapitulate the points which I have sought to press.
1. Marriage rightly undertaken is sanctioned by God.
2. That what He sanctions and joins together, man may not separate.
3. That though sin has brought in confusion, the divine thought of marriage has not been thereby changed, nor the facts altered.
4. That, what man joins together, man can and does
separate.
5. That conformity to man's law as to marriage, does
not by itself satisfy the divine requirement.
6. That nevertheless, man's ordinance must be observed for the Lord's sake.
7. That having conformed to man's law, it is good and blessed to own before God and His people, His higher claims and standard, and to seek His blessing and sanction, and their fellowship, prayers, and testimony in connection with marriage so entered into.
Finally, may all whose hearts are exercised about the marriage state, look to God and to the word of His grace for guidance upon the subject. It is more fully entered into in the word of God than any other of our natural relationships. In type and in substance it is constantly referred to, and good it is for the present peace and happiness of husband and wife, when their affections, their relationship, and all their mutual claims and duties, are founded on this sure and eternal guide.