Marriage

Boyd’s Bible Dictionary:

(husbanding). Monogamous (Gen. 2:18-24; 7:13¹⁸And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him. ¹⁹And out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof. ²⁰And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him. ²¹And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; ²²And the rib, which the Lord God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. ²³And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. ²⁴Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. (Genesis 2:18‑24)
¹³In the selfsame day entered Noah, and Shem, and Ham, and Japheth, the sons of Noah, and Noah's wife, and the three wives of his sons with them, into the ark; (Genesis 7:13)). Polygamous (Gen. 4:19; 6:2¹⁹And Lamech took unto him two wives: the name of the one was Adah, and the name of the other Zillah. (Genesis 4:19)
²That the sons of God saw the daughters of men that they were fair; and they took them wives of all which they chose. (Genesis 6:2)). Forbidden within certain degrees (Lev. 18; Deut. 27); and with foreigners (Ex. 34:16¹⁶And thou take of their daughters unto thy sons, and their daughters go a whoring after their gods, and make thy sons go a whoring after their gods. (Exodus 34:16)). Monogamy re-instituted (Matt. 19:5-6⁵And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? ⁶Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. (Matthew 19:5‑6); Mark 10:5-10⁵And Jesus answered and said unto them, For the hardness of your heart he wrote you this precept. ⁶But from the beginning of the creation God made them male and female. ⁷For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife; ⁸And they twain shall be one flesh: so then they are no more twain, but one flesh. ⁹What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. ¹⁰And in the house his disciples asked him again of the same matter. (Mark 10:5‑10)).

Concise Bible Dictionary:

This is God’s institution: He said it was not good that man should be alone, and He provided a suitable help for Adam in the person of Eve. Adam said, “This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman (isha), because she was taken out of Man (ish). Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh” (Gen. 2:23-24²³And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. ²⁴Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. (Genesis 2:23‑24)). This declaration of union was confirmed by the Lord, who, in quoting the above, added, “Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder” (Matt. 19:5-6⁵And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? ⁶Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. (Matthew 19:5‑6); Mark 10:7-9⁷For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife; ⁸And they twain shall be one flesh: so then they are no more twain, but one flesh. ⁹What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. (Mark 10:7‑9)). It is confirmed also by being taken as a type of the sacred union of the Lord with the church: “We are members of His body, of His flesh and of His bones. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh. This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church” (Eph. 5:30-32³⁰For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones. ³¹For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh. ³²This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church. (Ephesians 5:30‑32)).

All this shows that God’s institution of marriage was the union of one man and one woman, the two, and only two, becoming one. What is more than this is not of God, but is of human lust. This order was first broken through by Lamech, the sixth from Adam, who had two wives. Long after this instances are recorded of wives, on account of their great desire for children, giving their maid servants to their husbands: an act that would now be judged as most unnatural in a wife. Sarai gave her Egyptian handmaid to Abram “to be his wife” (the same word for “wife” being used for both Sarai and Hagar), and God said He would make of Ishmael a great nation. Jacob’s two wives gave their handmaids to their husband, and thus he had four wives. God reckoned the twelve sons of these four women equally as sons of Jacob, and they became the heads of the twelve tribes. It might have been thought that God would not have blessed the issue of these unions, but He did: there is no record of any law having been given on this subject.

In early times marriages were also contracted between near relatives. This was altered by the law of Moses as well as restrictions introduced as to divorce, though even under the law, because of the hardness of their hearts, Moses allowed them to put away their wives for any cause, “but from the beginning it was not so,” and from the time the Lord was on earth it was not to be so any longer (Matt. 19:5-9⁵And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? ⁶Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. ⁷They say unto him, Why did Moses then command to give a writing of divorcement, and to put her away? ⁸He saith unto them, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so. ⁹And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery. (Matthew 19:5‑9)). The choice of persons to be appointed as bishops and deacons in the church, was restricted to those who were the husbands of “one wife” (1 Tim. 3:2,12²A bishop then must be blameless, the husband of one wife, vigilant, sober, of good behavior, given to hospitality, apt to teach; (1 Timothy 3:2)
¹²Let the deacons be the husbands of one wife, ruling their children and their own houses well. (1 Timothy 3:12); Titus 1:6⁶If any be blameless, the husband of one wife, having faithful children not accused of riot or unruly. (Titus 1:6)). God has providentially so ordered it in all countries called Christian that a man is allowed to have but one wife; and in the best of those countries a man cannot divorce his wife except when she herself has already broken the marriage bond. Instruction is given in the Epistles to both: the wives are to be in subjection to their husbands, and the husbands are to love and cherish their wives, even as Christ the church (Eph. 5:28-29²⁸So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. ²⁹For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church: (Ephesians 5:28‑29)).

It is not now known how the negotiations were conducted that led to a man and woman being betrothed, or espoused, or what were the ceremonies usually attending it. The betrothed couple were at once looked upon as husband and wife, as seen in the case of Joseph, who thought of divorcing his espoused wife Mary (Matt. 1:18-19¹⁸Now the birth of Jesus Christ was on this wise: When as his mother Mary was espoused to Joseph, before they came together, she was found with child of the Holy Ghost. ¹⁹Then Joseph her husband, being a just man, and not willing to make her a publick example, was minded to put her away privily. (Matthew 1:18‑19)). In the East a man does not usually see his espoused wife until they are married (as Isaac did not see Rebecca and had no choice in the matter), the engagement, and the amount of dowry to be paid by the husband to the bride’s father, being arranged by the relatives.

Of the ancient marriage ceremonies very little is known. On the night of a marriage the young women went forth with lamps or torches to meet the bridegroom and to escort him to the house of the bride, as in Matthew 25. Such processions have been seen in modern times, and the same cry has been heard, “Behold the bridegroom.” They had marriage feasts, as in the parable of Matthew 22 (when a special garment was provided for each of the guests), and as the one to which the Lord, His mother, and His disciples were invited at Cana, where the Lord made the water into wine (John 2:1-11¹And the third day there was a marriage in Cana of Galilee; and the mother of Jesus was there: ²And both Jesus was called, and his disciples, to the marriage. ³And when they wanted wine, the mother of Jesus saith unto him, They have no wine. ⁴Jesus saith unto her, Woman, what have I to do with thee? mine hour is not yet come. ⁵His mother saith unto the servants, Whatsoever he saith unto you, do it. ⁶And there were set there six waterpots of stone, after the manner of the purifying of the Jews, containing two or three firkins apiece. ⁷Jesus saith unto them, Fill the waterpots with water. And they filled them up to the brim. ⁸And he saith unto them, Draw out now, and bear unto the governor of the feast. And they bare it. ⁹When the ruler of the feast had tasted the water that was made wine, and knew not whence it was: (but the servants which drew the water knew;) the governor of the feast called the bridegroom, ¹⁰And saith unto him, Every man at the beginning doth set forth good wine; and when men have well drunk, then that which is worse: but thou hast kept the good wine until now. ¹¹This beginning of miracles did Jesus in Cana of Galilee, and manifested forth his glory; and his disciples believed on him. (John 2:1‑11)).

The assembly has been espoused as a chaste virgin to Christ (2 Cor. 11:2²For I am jealous over you with godly jealousy: for I have espoused you to one husband, that I may present you as a chaste virgin to Christ. (2 Corinthians 11:2)); and it waits for that glorious time when it will be said, “Let us be glad and rejoice, and give honor to Him: for the marriage of the Lamb is come, and His wife hath made herself ready.... arrayed in fine linen, clean and white; for the fine linen is the righteousnesses of saints.... Blessed are they which are called unto the marriage supper of the Lamb” (Rev. 19:7-9⁷Let us be glad and rejoice, and give honor to him: for the marriage of the Lamb is come, and his wife hath made herself ready. ⁸And to her was granted that she should be arrayed in fine linen, clean and white: for the fine linen is the righteousness of saints. ⁹And he saith unto me, Write, Blessed are they which are called unto the marriage supper of the Lamb. And he saith unto me, These are the true sayings of God. (Revelation 19:7‑9)). The Lord will also have an earthly bride during the kingdom (Hos. 2:7⁷And she shall follow after her lovers, but she shall not overtake them; and she shall seek them, but shall not find them: then shall she say, I will go and return to my first husband; for then was it better with me than now. (Hosea 2:7)). See also the Song of Solomon.

“57. Marriage Feast” From Manners and Customs of the Bible:

Genesis 29:22²²And Laban gathered together all the men of the place, and made a feast. (Genesis 29:22). Laban gathered together all the men of the place and made a feast.

The usual duration of a marriage feast was a week. Thus, “Fulfill her week,” in verse 27, means, “Wait until the week’s festivities are over.” This was the duration of Samson’s marriage feast (Judg. 14:12¹²And Samson said unto them, I will now put forth a riddle unto you: if ye can certainly declare it me within the seven days of the feast, and find it out, then I will give you thirty sheets and thirty change of garments: (Judges 14:12)).

“233. Betrothal and Marriage” From Manners and Customs of the Bible:

Judges 14:7-8⁷And he went down, and talked with the woman; and she pleased Samson well. ⁸And after a time he returned to take her, and he turned aside to see the carcase of the lion: and, behold, there was a swarm of bees and honey in the carcase of the lion. (Judges 14:7‑8). He went down, and talked with the woman; and she pleased Samson well. And after a time he returned to take her.

The former part of this passage has reference, doubtless, to the betrothal; the latter part, to the marriage. About a year usually elapsed between betrothal and marriage, though this was not always the case. The expression “after a time,” literally, after days, is sometimes equivalent to a year.

“539. Mirth at Marriages” From Manners and Customs of the Bible:

Jeremiah 7:34³⁴Then will I cause to cease from the cities of Judah, and from the streets of Jerusalem, the voice of mirth, and the voice of gladness, the voice of the bridegroom, and the voice of the bride: for the land shall be desolate. (Jeremiah 7:34). Then will I cause to cease from the cities of Judah, and from the streets of Jerusalem, the voice of mirth, and the voice of gladness, the voice of the bridegroom, and the voice of the bride.

Marriages in the East are celebrated by processions of friends, who throng the streets and give noisy demonstrations of their joy. Singers and musicians accompany them, and the shouts and music are heard afar off. Miss Rogers gives a lively account of a wedding party she once met not far from Mount Carmel. “Pleasant sounds of voices, songs, bells, and laughter reached us, and we saw an animated little party approaching, mounted on camels, whose nodding heads and necks were decorated with beads, shells, crimson tassels, and strings of little tinkling bells” (Domestic Life in Palestine, p. 94).

Among the Mohammedans no marriages are allowed during the month of Ramadan, which is their solemn annual fast. The troubles to come upon Judah are represented in the text by the prediction of utter silence in the streets. See also Jeremiah 16:9; 25:10; 33:11⁹For thus saith the Lord of hosts, the God of Israel; Behold, I will cause to cease out of this place in your eyes, and in your days, the voice of mirth, and the voice of gladness, the voice of the bridegroom, and the voice of the bride. (Jeremiah 16:9)
¹⁰Moreover I will take from them the voice of mirth, and the voice of gladness, the voice of the bridegroom, and the voice of the bride, the sound of the millstones, and the light of the candle. (Jeremiah 25:10)
¹¹The voice of joy, and the voice of gladness, the voice of the bridegroom, and the voice of the bride, the voice of them that shall say, Praise the Lord of hosts: for the Lord is good; for his mercy endureth for ever: and of them that shall bring the sacrifice of praise into the house of the Lord. For I will cause to return the captivity of the land, as at the first, saith the Lord. (Jeremiah 33:11); Revelation 18:23²³And the light of a candle shall shine no more at all in thee; and the voice of the bridegroom and of the bride shall be heard no more at all in thee: for thy merchants were the great men of the earth; for by thy sorceries were all nations deceived. (Revelation 18:23).

“707. Marriage Procession” From Manners and Customs of the Bible:

Matthew 25:1¹Then shall the kingdom of heaven be likened unto ten virgins, which took their lamps, and went forth to meet the bridegroom. (Matthew 25:1). Ten virgins, which took their lamps, and went forth to meet the bridegroom.

On the occasion of a marriage the bridegroom, attended by his friends, went to the house of his bride, and brought her with her friends in joyful procession to his own house. The virgins mentioned in the text were probably some of the friends of the bride, who were to meet and join the procession at some convenient place.